Ladies, let me let you in on a little secret; when it comes to men, competition begets commitment. If you really want exclusivity with that new guy that you are seeing, the best thing you can do is show interest in other men!
I can attest to this from my personal experience. A few months ago I met this incredible guy and we started going out. He had a good physique and a charming personality and before long I was head over heels in love and wanted him to be mine. The only problem was that he didn’t feel the same way.
Although he asserted that he was interested in me, he was never very keen on taking our relationship to the next level. He gave me all sorts of excuses as to why he couldn’t make things official with us even though we had been going out for quite sometime.
All that changed one day when I got a surprise email from my ex. In the email, my ex expressed his wish to get back together with me. He said he missed me and would do anything to get me back. I innocently shared the email with my boyfriend and I was surprised by his reaction.
First he demanded that I write back to him and tell him that I was in a relationship and that I was very happy and content in the relationship. That coming from a guy who would recoil at the very thought of the word ‘commitment’ or ‘relationship’!
He then became very interested in knowing how I felt about him and the relationship and if I saw a future with him. From then on he became a very attentive suitor. He started taking me out on nice dates more often. He bought me presents for no special reasons and started communicating more frequently.
While before I would get a quick phone call once in week when lucky, he now started calling everyday and our conversations would go on until late at night. He even started introducing me to people as his girlfriend. I met all his friends and a few members of his family. He made it very clear we were a couple and that he was very much in love with me. I finally got the commitment I wanted and all it took was one email from my ex to spur him into action!
It is true, from a biological perspective that men frown at commitment early on in the relationship even if they really like the girl because their primal instinct is to have as many women as possible and sire as many children as possible. However, what women don’t know is that they can use another more powerful primal male drive to get around this; competition.
It may seem counter-intuitive because when you love a man you want to be with him only and other men don’t interest you but if you want a commitment, show him that you are attractive to other men and he will, without a doubt, become more interested because men like to win. A man is much more likely to make things official with you if he feels threatened another man might steal you away. Until your guy finally comes to his senses and realizes that he wants to be with you only, don’t stop showing interest in other men.
Keep your options open, even if you’re not particularly interested in these other guys. It’s a game smart women play. You will be surprised a how fast he will suggest to move things from casual into a committed relationship.