It’s never too late to make resolutions

Hi Chris,

All my friends and family seem to make resolutions every New Year, and this year’s been no exception. But every year I also see them quickly put aside.

And never see any evidence that anything’s really changed. But watching them go through their annual ritual this year has started me thinking.

Because there are loads of times that I’ve felt the urge to make more of myself and my life. So can you suggest some changes that I can make that will really make a difference? And will stick?

Good Resolutions

Chris says,

Hi Good Resolutions

You’re right, people do feel an urge to make resolutions at the New Year. To exercise more, lose weight, drink less or whatever. Even though they soon slip back into their old habits.

But setting goals is a good idea, any time of year! So what might really work for you?

Things like deciding to be nicer to strangers. Or setting aside 30 minutes every day with a good book. Those might sound simple ideas, but that’s just the point. They make a difference, and when you realise you’re keeping to them, you’ll be surprised at how good you feel!

Avoid making ‘all or nothing’ plans. So instead of saying you won’t ever get angry in future, resolve to get angry less often, or cut your husband a bit of slack. Things like these actually work.

How about resolving to organise things so you and your husband can relax together and talk more often. To really listen to him, and accept him as he really is. Do the same for yourself, and your whole marriage will change!

Or if you’re still looking for a partner, do more of the things you enjoy, because people are attracted to anyone who’s having fun. And to speak to more strangers, because that’s how every relationship starts.

Learn how to make the small talk that checks out whether a new guy’s life make sense, before you even risk a first date. And stop tolerating bad dating behaviour. If he doesn’t call when he says he will, move on.

How about deciding to understand your own emotions better? Because it’s your emotions that create the sense of direction and purpose in your life.

And yet few of us ever really try to understand them. Mostly we think that our emotions are something that just happens. But they’re not.

So learn what triggers each of your moods, how they affect those around you, how to read social situations, and to figure out what’s likely to happen next. It will make a big difference to your relationships and your career.

And before you know it, you’ll realise that your life’s changed. And become far more fulfilling.

All the best,

Chris