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Girl code: Why do people cry at their weddings?

Readers Lounge By Beryl Wanga Itindi
Many people cry at their weddings (Photo: Shutterstock)

Last week, a friend of mine posed a question to me on why some people cry on their wedding days. It got me thinking deeply and brought memories of the wedding I once planned but never happened.

That was like ten years ago. We broke up just two months to the wedding so I never really experienced what it would be like walking down the aisle.

I had really been looking forward to that day. I am, however, not sure whether I would have cried as I walked down the aisle, I hadn’t suffered much in love to make me see this as a miracle.

I believe that people shed tears of joy on their wedding day because they consider the event a miracle.

My love life had been smooth and I knew from the word go that I was set to wed and live happily ever after just like Cinderella.

I later came to realise that the light at the end of the tunnel was actually a torch that dimmed as days went by. By the time I got out of the tunnel, the torch had gone off.

Anyway, I now have a whole new opinion on whether I would cry if ever I were to walk down the aisle. I actually think I will wail, let alone cry.

The moment the whole church will rise to welcome the bride is the moment my drama will begin.

I will take three steps, think about my pregnancy journey and sigh. Three more steps, I will think about how the man took off after realising I was pregnant, then I will wipe a tear.

Whoever will walk me down the aisle on this day has a huge task ahead of them because I will take three more steps, remember my cancelled wedding and start sobbing. What will make me start wailing is the fact that I will actually be at the wedding! To me, now, that’s a miracle.

So I would love to inform all my guests in advance that on my wedding day, I will wail until people think I have a change of mind about the event.

Many years ago, I used to look at brides crying on their wedding day and wonder what exactly was wrong with them. It was even more confusing for me if it was the groom crying. I couldn’t understand why someone would shed tears on their wedding day.

I probably had a heart as cold as steel because of the smooth journey I had with love. Mine was smooth, really smooth. I got into a relationship with someone while in college and it turned out to be the perfect relationship that came with all the good things in life. At some point, our friends used to refer to us as the best couple they had ever come across.

Everyone was shocked the day we broke up. In fact, we too were shocked. It never even hit us that we had broken up until one and a half years later. All along, we thought that we were just playing around by cutting communication with each other.

Ever since, I haven’t really been lucky with love. I think I have met all the Toms, Dicks and Harrys that my Mama warned me about.

Talk of the cheater, I met him standing tall and handsome. Talk of the emotional abuser, I met him sitting pretty waiting to date me.

I met a thief, a conman and finally a runaway father. He who gave me my sweet baby and took off faster than a deer runs from a leopard.

Then I have had to experience life with heartbreakers. Those who will tell you today that they love you and deny you the following day.

All these thoughts got me thinking of whether or not I will shed tears on my wedding day. Your guess is as good as mine.

Carry your handkerchiefs because the wailing that will happen on that day will be enough to get me another husband among the guests present.

I will shout ‘I do’ at the top of my voice. I will dance till I drop and I will eat cake till my teeth ache.

That’s what’s going to happen on my wedding day!

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