A Mommy Story: They grow up faster than you think

I’m watching my two daughters playing and giggling, rolling around on the carpet. Occasionally the younger one, Ella, runs up to me and asks me to join in the current activity. A few minutes ago she asked me to dance. While we jigged our way to fame and fortune, at least in my mind, my elder one, Zee, was doubled over in laughter at my smooth moves. Conclusion? I must be an excellent dancer to evoke such joy. Which reminds me of that time… Zee was closing school and I had to pick her. By the time I arrived, I was late, flustered and bearing gifts. Pizza! Works all the time… make that most of the time. My profuse apologies for my tardiness were accepted at its sighting. I heaved a sigh of relief. On driving out, she was feasting on the pizza besides me. Feeling generous she handed me a slice. All of a sudden, PANDEMONIUM! She threw the pizza box, contents and all into the back seat, narrowly missing my ear. She growled “Let go, mum!” and grabbed my slice, literally tearing it from my mouth. What one thing never fails to make you feel better? In a flash she wiped her mouth, had the crumbs on her skirt disappear and sat there looking pretty! I was thoroughly confused. I asked, “What? What?” repeatedly, expecting to hear earthquake, fire, terrorist attack or such. I could taste fear on my tongue. “Mum, can’t you see?” At this point I was thinking she must have some super prophetic vision where she sees events seconds before they happen in real time. “What?” I asked again. “It’s a boy!” “A boy?” (Picture my clueless look yet?) “Yeah!” She looked at me like I just landed from Saturn.

“What about the boy?”   “We can’t eat while boys are watching!” I get that look again. “We can’t?” I asked incredulously. She hissed at me between her teeth, “No, we can’t!” looked over at the passing boy who smiled at her and she smiled sweetly back. Then she reached for the pizza.

It hit me. She’s now a teen.

I smile and remember an incident with Ella where I supposedly murdered ‘someone’ very dear to her.

I had killed a family member apparently, and sent her into emotional turmoil.  I didn't intend to, it was an act of spontaneous passion. I had just gotten home from work. From the periphery of my vision I spotted it. A hideous, vicious monstrosity. A cockroach! I scrambled to get something to obliterate it with. Slipper. Hammer. Grenade. Bomb. Something. ANYTHING! As I scrambled, my wee fearless one noticed there was a moving ...’thing’ in the house and was totally mesmerized! She was following it and giggling. I was thinking this...thing was going to eat her! Or something! She goes, "Dudu". I'm like, “No, Mende”. This is no time for a lesson though. Time for action! Supermom must protect her toddler. (*insert super hero theme song) I scramble faster. My hand clutches at something heavy. It will have to do. As I bring whatever down on the thing, a movie scene is played out. Everything is in slow motion. A small voice screams "Noooooo!" in a high pitched toddler voice...then BAM! Then silence.  Nailed it! I gave myself a mental pat on the back. Then all hell broke loose! (Why, oh why is pandemonium drawn to me?) Ella was wailing at the top of her voice, "Mum nooooo! Mum noooo!" over and over. I pulled her away from the thing, just in case it pulled a Lazarus. Ella was having none of that. I tried quieting her, she was inconsolable! I told her see, that was a bad 'mende'. She responded amid tears, "MENDE ANGU, MENDE ANGU!" I was left wondering at the turn of events. Supermom was suddenly super villain!   I had killed a family member in cold blood. Slime, in cold slime! What to do? I thought fast. "Baby, usilie. Taletea wewe mende ingine". She began to quiet down. For a while we were not friends. I was left in a quandary. Where was I to get a cockroach for my Ella...? Ella is tugging at my dress again. Time for another jig. Zee is already laughing.