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How Facebook will kill your relationship

My Man
 Photo: Courtesy

The mark of a true relationship is that it does not rely on Facebook updates to keep it thriving. Facebook is a bit like Hollywood. Every love story must have a happy ending. Scroll through the daily updates and you will be awed by the commitment that some Kenyan men pay to their women.

I have seen such sweet and touchy updates from men that generate likes from impressed and envious female digital voyeurs by the second. What a sensitive guy! Amazing! The tendency to post mushy updates is becoming a bit of a cliché, though.

I mean, you stay in the same house with her, spend the night together and you still want to post an update that reads, ‘Just to wish the love of my life a super day.”

Why does every important life change have to be announced on Facebook? What happened to just picking up the phone? I am always weary of couples who feel the need to give strangers a blow-by-blow account of how happy their relationships are.

Confessional booth

But as a result of this trend, more men feel pressurized to join the herd of Facebook romantics. Facebook is like a digital confessional booth where men are trooped in and forced to declare their love or else! It starts with simple things. Change your relationship profile to ‘in a relationship”.

The profile picture is replaced with a loving couple shot to mostly deter any women who might assume that you are single. Before you know it, you have an entire album of special moments surrendered to Facebook for public consumption.

Then you have to like or respond to every single status update your woman puts up, to show you truly care. You had better not forget any worthy anniversaries. While you are expected to accept the numerous compliments that follow your woman’s regular picture and status updates, that level of tolerance does not always apply to men.

Jealousy, insecurity

Post a new picture and a couple of total strangers respond with something as simple as, “Looking really handsome, Sam”. That is enough to start a confrontation and it does not help the matter in the least to say, “Babes, I have no idea who Suzie Hotpants is”.

Facebook is a festering ground for jealousy and insecurity. It can turn spying on your spouse’s digital activity into an obsession. Get a life. Spend more time offline in the real world talking to actual people and not their avatars.

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