How do we keep the spark alive after the honeymoon phase?

Hi Chris,

I’ve only been married a little while, but already I can feel our relationship becoming ‘routine’. Is that inevitable? How can we keep things as exciting as they were when we were first together?

Routine

Hi Routine!

A certain amount of routine is inevitable and not necessarily a bad thing. However, there’s no reason why you can’t also maintain the excitement!

Achieve this by becoming your husband’s lover. Then, together with the security, love and commitment of your marriage, you’ll have a life full of anticipation and excitement.

Keep Reading

Perhaps you’ve never seen yourself as a lover? If so, you’re definitely missing out.

Start changing that by thinking of yourself as someone who enjoys intimacy. Make some more space in your life, too. If you’re always rushing around, you won’t have enough time for intimacy. Creating this space may disappoint a few people, but it’s worth it.

Make time to unwind and dress in a way that makes you feel good. Listen to sensual music and wear perfume, even if it’s just in the bedroom. Remember times when you’ve enjoyed sex in the past. Imagine things you might do in the future. Go back to places where you used to love together. You’ll soon start to get excited again.

Start initiating intimacy more often. You’ll feel great being in control, and your husband will love it. Kiss him like you really mean it! Let him know what you want.

Send intimate texts, give each other silly nicknames and code words, and tease each other. Say things to your husband that push the boundaries of your saucy talk comfort zone. Plan for and look forward to intimate moments together. Try new positions, different times of day and locations, and a change in tempo. Do things that are slightly daring and outside your normal repertoire.

Go to bed together at the same time every night and have sex frequently! Just a few moments of kissing and cuddling every night will do wonders for your whole marriage.

All the best,

Chris