My in-laws want my husband to take a second wife!

"We have been married for seven years and we have never had a child. We have tried everything we could to no avail. My husband is getting frustrated that I cannot bear him a child. My in-laws are advising him to get a second wife to give him children. I am stressed and depressed."

What was the most embarrassing moment of your life?

Most couples go through pain and agony before getting their first baby. The expectation of the community, and especially in-laws, is that a couple should get a child in the first year of marriage. That is not always the case and you are a testimony to that fact.

A family is complete with a husband and wife. A child’s arrival is not an indication of completeness. It is an addition to the family. While people refer to children as a blessing - and that is the truth - it should not be misconstrued to mean a family without a baby is not blessed.

The solution would be purposeful communication and restraining of the people who are stressing you about getting a baby. Your husband should not allow his relatives to push you - unless he is part of the scheme to frustrate you.

I believe by now you know why you have not been able to get a baby. If not, get an opinion from different doctors and experts.

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If it is not possible for your husband and you to have a baby, consider adopting one to live in your house or helping orphans and vulnerable or abandoned children in baby centres. This way, you will fulfil your heart’s desire to raise children. Is your husband frustrating you in any way? Is he blaming you for not being able to get a baby? You may need to attend a therapy session as a couple to deal with the issues together.

My son was sent away from school last week on suspicion of taking drugs. We were asked to take him for a drug test, which turned out to be positive for marijuana. He is 16 years old and in Form 2. This is the second school he has been since joining high school. I am contemplating transferring him to a day school. Unfortunately, I travel a lot and I am not at home often. I am worried that he might continue taking the weed without our knowledge. What should I do?

The fact that your son has already been to two different schools is worrying. While not all children are able to attend the same school till completion, transferring because of certain challenges is not always a good thing.

Your son is going through an identity crisis. He has learnt how to manipulate you and take advantage of you. While he may unconsciously be doing it, the more you sing to his tune of bad behaviour, the more he will continue jumping from one bad habit to another.

Most teenagers need guidance and, unfortunately, not all parents are able to successfully guide their children.

You may need to get a mentor for your son. The fact that he is taking marijuana is an indication of a void in his life. There are different reasons he might be taking drugs, but the fact that he is not a frequent user gives some hope.

The doctor or counsellor who conducted the test must have recommended some steps to help your son.

In every one identified patient, there are five more who are good at hiding their addiction problems.

The fact is that the school has marijuana challenges and needs to address it to assist the other students. This is the chance for the administration to do so.