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Hi Chris!
My teenage daughter’s so preoccupied with her body it’s driving me nuts. She’s always in the bathroom, wears the skimpiest clothes and constantly complains that she’s fat and ugly when she isn’t.
Should I be worried?
Teen Bodies
Chris says,Hi Teen Bodies!
Teens have always been preoccupied with their appearance, and for them the smallest bodily flaw is a total disaster!
They also have little idea of what ‘attractive’ means. So girls think that boys want them to be super thin, which they don’t. While the boys strive after macho-shaped bodies because they think that’s what girls prefer, which simply isn’t true.
Partly, this results from the way men and women are portrayed in the media, where females are always thinner and males more muscled than in real life. So not surprisingly, teen girls who are forever on their phones usually end up trying to be super-thin.
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But the media isn’t entirely to blame, because our preferences for body shapes are inbuilt and only made worse by the media. For example, men’s preference for thinner women is really a bias towards youth.
This is genetically preferred because younger women are usually more fertile. Men also tend to prefer women with slim waists and wider hips because this indicates good health and fertility.
But the more that a culture has been exposed to Western influence, the more extreme these preferences become.
So Westernised people are much more likely to feel that plump people are unhealthy compared to more traditional Africans, where plumpness is associated with fertility, wealth and security.
While in the West, being thin implies you can afford designer clothes and gym memberships, and shop at health food stores!
So don’t worry about your daughter. Teens have always been this way. By all means, explain to her how the media’s biased her ideas about beauty, but she won’t really listen to you.
And watch out for any signs that she’s really going overboard. Get professional help if you see extreme dieting or excessive working out. But she’ll most likely just grow out of it.
All the best,
Chris
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