Women should wait until they hit thirty to get married if they want it to last

Dear women, do not rush into marriage unless you want a near-fifty per cent chance of divorce. Now I know I have your attention.

Here is my honest opinion, based on my awesome powers of observation, and from many decades of being interested in human behaviour: women should only get married after they hit 30 years. Controversial, I know, but also, it is the truth. However, there are terms and conditions, as this can only be achieved by those who turn a deaf ear to statements like, ‘no man will want you at that age,’ and similar lies. Fact: There will always be someone who wants you at whatever age.

See, and this must not be confused for marital advice, if you want a peaceful, lasting marriage, the kind of marriage you look forward to at the end of a day to see your partner, women must wait for thirty. Why? Simply because this is the age of achieving complete self-awareness.

In the olden days, women the world over were married off young. As soon as she got her first period, she was paired off. We all know the age of the man did not really matter. I am not even here to argue if or not it was wrong - it was not, for back then. For starters, life expectancy was low. For instance, in the early 1900s, it is recorded to have been about thirty years. It made sense to rush. Not now, because we are living longer.

Women were homemakers who doubled as bringing forth life. Although science is threatening to have machines heavily involved in the process of foetal incubation, that remains carte blanche for women. What has not stuck is that they are just homemakers.

During the hunter/gatherer period, men were the better hunters. They were lighter, faster, stronger and lithe. Women’s biology did not allow for climbing trees fast to avoid a charging rhino or running after an antelope. If we are being honest, men were easier to replace than women, and the death of a man in his prime while hunting was considered heroic. Not a woman - they were precious, women were.

The hunting/gathering era is well behind us, or we could say it has evolved. The literal hunting is illegal anyway, and its two-point-O version can easily be done by women. That’s the boardroom where you do not need muscle or speed, unless it is brain muscle and brain speed. Women are thriving in businesses and in the corporate world. They still need to take time off to give birth and nurse the baby, but that is an awesome compromise.

Back then, there was no school to fill up early adult life. Juggling school and a marriage or parenthood is exhausting, and no wonder many people prefer to wait until they are done at the average age of 25.

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Lifestyles have evolved with people. There is partying to do, and the years after college are meant for winding down, otherwise known as partying or discovering oneself. These are the years of freedom, including financial freedom. These are the years of dating and knowing the type of person one would like to spend the rest of their life with. The years between 25 and 30 might just be the only five years one has responsibility only to themselves. They should be used exhaustively.

By the time 30 hits, the body is tired, and hopefully with that, one typically runs out of partying steam. After thirty, partying becomes a task and being a couch potato becomes appealing. And those are the years to settle down and make a home if one chooses to.

If you do not believe me, look around you. Women, especially those who married early, develop itchy feet in their thirties. Divorce rates tend to be higher among people who settled early in life. This is not an opinion; it is a fact backed by research. Forty-four per cent of people who marry between the ages of twenty to twenty-five end up divorcing, compared to 25 per cent who marry after the age of twenty-five. The higher the age of the couple at marriage, the less likely they are to divorce.

The young ones get itchy feet because their system knows there is a stage of life they missed, and that system demands that they have it ticked.