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Men only: Want to date rich guys? They don't like 'users'

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 To catch a richer guy, look good, or try your best to look a bit more ‘beautiful’ (Photo: Shutterstock)

Last weekend in Naivasha, Keroche Breweries heiress Tecra Muigai was laid to rest.

Lots of luminaries attended the private burial – ODM major domo Raila ‘Tinga’ Odinga, Nakuru Governor Lee Kinyanjui, senators Jim Orengo, George Khaniri and Wetangula, Honourables Moses Kuria, Jane Kihara and Esther Passaris, and Martha Karua. As they say, politics (and funerals in Kenya) make for strange bedfellows.

We were at Tecra’s 18th birthday party, when she became an adult (with 60 percent of her lifespan already gone, unbeknown to anyone). That was 12 or 13 years ago with the local celebrities of those years. We rode to some mansion in a Mash Motors limousine, driven by Odhis, a tall rake in a crooked chauffeur’s cape.

To this day, I swear I cannot tell you where we went, or how we left, because we were all plastered like fish (is that what some folks refer to as the ‘wild old days,’ when we were youth)? I only recall writing her some doggerel verse that had a line about how Tecla Lorupe’s real name is actually ‘Tecra Rolupe’ (and making it rhyme with Our Lady of Guadalupe).

And that’s the last I ever saw, or really heard about Tecra (her sister Anerlisa Muigai is more notorious on these social media streets) until news of her passing about three weeks ago.

Like in many tragic cases where there is money, sex and drink/drugs involved, her sad demise quickly evolved to questions of her ‘broke boyfriend’? What was the heiress to a multi-billion shilling empire doing dating a bushy 51-year-old Lamu fisherman/beach boy? That is another article.

Today let’s talk to young women who would like to date ‘rich’ men, rich here being relative to the ‘poverty’ of the woman in question ...

I mean, there are a few multi-millionaires (and even fewer billionaires) out there, almost none of whom is young or single. Then there are ladies who, if a man sends them a thao bob for ‘fare ya Uber’ every weekend, to come serve and service him, he is considered fabulously wealthy.

Whatever lane a woman is aiming to date, or even marry into, it is often a bit faster than the one she’s in – that’s why very few junior female managers ever marry the male office messenger.

The first rule is the richer the guy, the wider the range of his choices when it comes to women. So, look good, or try your best to look a bit more ‘beautiful.’

By that, sisemi you go for plastic surgery; I just mean don’t go around with hair that hasn’t seen a salon since lock down went down, and a ‘Uhuruto Tano Tena’ T shirt over grandma jeans, then sniff: ‘Si unajua kuna coronavirus? My Mr. Right will see my inner beauty.’ No, he won’t – he’ll see Senor Ruto’s face at the back of that T-sho!

Next thing, however wonderful it sounds (here I’m looking at my upstairs neighbor Beryl) is not to say that ‘to share is to care,’ then you share all your problems with him on day one and expect him to take care of them, and you.

These guys feel stressed out, unless they are &

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