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Are Kenyan girls too cheap for Naija men?

Living

In 2013 deported Nairobi based business man Anthony Chinedu was quoted saying: "We are doing Kenya a favour by marrying their women. I have never heard of a Kenyan man marrying a Nigerian. Without Nigeria's patronage, Kenyan Airways would fold up."

How have you changed in the past two years?

This led to a debate fueling more controversy on why Kenyan women fall for Nigerian men. Some even claimed that Nigerian men pretend when they come to Kenya.

This writer spent a few days in Nigeria which gave her an opportunity to observe how the Naija brodas behave in their own country and truth be told they even spend more on their women. In fact, some of them confessed that it's 'cheaper' to maintain a Kenyan woman compared to Naija girls. We look at some of the reasons why Kenyan women are labeled 'cheap'.

Open for valueless sex

To woo a Nigerian woman is a ceremony. According to Damilola Sonji, who spent four years in Kenya, says that wooing a Kenyan woman is much easier and cheaper than a Nigerian lady. As a man who benefited from one night stands confessed that if he lived in Kenya he would never have a permanent girlfriend till he is 40.

"You see Kenyan women are very different. You can meet in a night club and end up with her in your house without any expectations. Naija girls on the other hand expect you to bring down heavens for them. You might even end up buying a house for her before you can take her to bed," Damilola said.

Desperate for cheap beer

While Kenyan women can easily drown a bottle of Guinness a Nigerian will only drown a bottle of stout in her local. The moment a Nigerian woman walks into a club, there is man already ordering drinks for her.

Diana Bada a Russian born Nigerian musician who was in Kenya for a month agrees that Kenyan women are indeed different.

"In Nigeria it's almost obvious that women don't spend money in a night club. Our men take care of us and that's their responsibility. It does not necessarily mean that you will go home and sleep with him. It's just our culture," said the musician who performed in Olesereni, Kilifi and Mombasa.

Diana says that she was shocked to see her friend panic when one of their Nigerian friends volunteered his car to drop them off.

"We went to eat at a Nigerian restaurant and it turned out that the owners knew my friend. They therefore offered us a car to drop us home and save us taxi money. We were even given clothes by the people who also own a fashion house. My friend almost had a heart attack thinking that the man wanted more. It took a lot of convincing for her to accept that that's how women are treated in Nigeria," Diana told us.

 

Sponsor mentality

Socialites have single handedly convinced young girls that there is good life in Nigeria. Infact nowadays most Kenyan girls are posing nude online showing off their buttocks hoping that someone will discover them and fly them to the new land of opportunity where they will take more photos in poses that could easily have them confused for a disabled woman.

Nigerian musician General Pipe claims it's not always as rosy as it seems in Nigeria but is shocked at the lengths Kenyan women will go just to bag a Nigerian man.

"I know one Kenyan socialite whose first visit in Nigeria was disastrous. She almost slept in the streets but was rescued by a fellow Kenyan. She spent the rest of her days fondling with any man with a nice shoe. Naija babes can make you pay for their flight to your country and never show up because they will somehow find a way to sell the ticket," said the musician who lived in Kenya in 2012.

Love to chop chop around

Having sex at some point in a woman's life is fad. A common point of discussion for a gossip session. It even gets spicier if a woman has sampled outside Kenya. According to Folorunsho Agbede a Nigerian teacher who was in the country for only a week says she was shocked at the activities that went on in the hotel she was staying.

"It was a conference for Nigerian and Kenyan teachers and we were staying at a high end hotel near Valley road. I noticed that our Kenyan female counterparts were sharing rooms with our Nigerian male colleagues just two days after we met. I know some of these men are married back at home so this really came as a shocker to me. I'm not saying that we are perfect maybe we are just difficult," Folorunsho shared with us.

Confidence issues

Naija girls are very confident. In fact a man insults them for not being submissive they will easily defend themselves. Kenyan girls on the other hand are very reserved. According to Olamide Ojuon, he would date a Kenyan girl but never marry her.

"I just feel that Kenyan girls are not confident. I wish I could show you the messages I get from girls I have broken up with and how they react. They always ask where they went wrong. If a woman is confident she should know that she is beautiful and a man who leaves her is the looser. I want an aggressive woman. I want to chase someone so when I get them I won't want to lose them. Maybe I can just find that back home," Olamide, a Nairobi based gym instructor said.

Willing to be bread winners

While Wanjiku is willing to finance Obiajulu's shoddy activities locally a Ijeoma would never do that because she is already used to the fact that men are providers. "A man should provide for you, your friends and family if possible. That's his responsibility. For a Naija babe to get with a man he must be willing to chop money. Isn't that she same in Kenya? No romance without finance right?" Chike Adobi sought to find out from us as she looked forward to dating a Kenyan man.

Open minded family

Apart from a few cases of influential families, Kenyan girls can easily choose whom they want to be with even if he is a pauper. With the come-we-stay being recognized as formal marriage most people don't even inform their families till they have had a child. However when a Naija girls shows interest in a man her family starts researching his back ground.

Nigerian musician Flavor actually expressed this as one of the reasons he has not married yet.

"Marriage in Nigeria is a very big deal and that's why women and men don't rush into it. When a girl shows interest in a man the family starts snooping just to find out his back ground. That's why Naija girls are very choosy," Flavor told us in a previous interview.

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