My girlfriend breaks up with me every time we have an argument. How can I make her realise her behaviour isn’t acceptable? - Evewoman
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My girlfriend breaks up with me every time we have an argument. How can I make her realise her behaviour isn’t acceptable?

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Dear Coleen

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My girlfriend and I are now eight months into our relationship but she keeps breaking up with me every time we have an argument – even if it’s her fault.

It’s just happened again but now I miss her so much. She hasn’t been in touch since it happened.

I want her to apologise because I think I deserve it, but I don’t think she could do that.

How can I make her realise that her behaviour isn’t acceptable?

Coleen says

It smacks of a lack of relationship experience to me and maybe a lack of maturity, too. It sounds as if she loves the drama.

I don’t blame you for getting weary of being dumped every time there’s a minor dispute.

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Part of being in a relationship is talking things out when you disagree or even not talking for a few hours to give each other space and a chance to calm down. But you don’t break up every time you have a row.

Hold your nerve and see how far she pushes it. I’m sure she’s expecting you to start begging her to get back together – so don’t do it.

I understand you miss her but if she doesn’t get in touch, what message is that sending out? That she’s stubborn, inflexible, unable to admit when she’s at fault and inconsiderate when it comes to your feelings? Do you really want to be with someone like that?

In my opinion, it’s not realistic to carry on with a relationship where you’re too scared to be honest with your girlfriend in case she dumps you.

You shouldn’t have to bottle up your feelings like that.

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