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What you should know before going through your partner's phone

 Do you go through your partner's phone? (Photo: Courtesy)

Every relationship has its own ups and inevitably, downs. When things are going well, the romance blooms but when there are cracks, you might find yourself doing the most outrageous things to find some closure.

A common thing that people do when something is wrong is going through their partner’s phone.

Whether or not that is your style, that is all on you.

It is a very stressful process where you have to plan everything without getting caught. Some people say that it’s okay to do it if you are suspecting something is up while others say your partner’s phone is a no-go zone.

Right now, you might be thinking on spying on your significant other but before you do it, this is what you need to consider:

There is a deeper problem

You first need to understand what is making you feel like this is the best move to make.

Has your partner been showing signs that they might be cheating and you need to dig for the truth? Or have they actually cheated before and certain things they are doing now are triggering you?

Another possible reason is that you have some unresolved issues within that are making you feel insecure and not that they have done something suspicious.

At this point, it is important that you take time to answer the question ‘why?’ before you go looking for trouble because you will find it.

You probably wouldn’t like being treated that way

You also need to honestly think of whether you would be fine if they did the same and went through your phone behind your back. The whole act of snooping is a big breach of trust because your phone is your private property.

Most people in relationships are okay with being open with each other when it comes to their phones but that doesn’t mean that you automatically have permission to investigate every single detail.

Think of whether you would like that if the tables were done then make a decision based on your decision. 

 One day you will get what you are looking for (Photo: Courtesy)
You might find what you are looking for

Suppose you go through your partner’s phone and you find that what you have been suspecting is actually real. Now what?

If he or she is fond of flirting or cheating and you always bust them by snooping on their phone, how exactly do you plan on breaking the news of how you found out?

Such situations usually escalate and go from zero to 100 in a matter of minutes. Justified as you may feel to do so to catch their lying donkey, they will obviously be offended by your actions once they find out you went through their phone.

That will be one ugly outburst you should prepare for.

It could end the relationship

The other possible thing that could happen is, you go through their messages and find that there is nothing going on you were simply overreacting only for them to find out what you did and the trust is completely broken.

For some people, this intrusive habit is a deal breaker and they might decide that they would rather not deal with you anymore.

You need a real solution

You need to find a better solution whether you have been having some trust issues in your relationship or are dealing with some personal problems.

You need to address the real issue, otherwise you will keep having the same problems over and over again without making any progress.

It’s time to openly communicate about your fears and start the healing process both as an individual and as a couple.

And if you truly feel something is off, communicate but don’t go snooping around. That is not the way to do it.

If you find yourself unable to get to your partner because they are not being truthful or they’re acting all defensive to the point of becoming abusive-which happens, you have the option of walking away too in case you forgot where the door is.

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