Girl code: Let’s talk men and house chores

Because I am in the mood to engage married men today, I will ask you this question; Can you participate in your own house chores without being pushed, or must your women bribe you? I have not only seen but also experienced what it means to be helped, or not, with house chores.

I must say that the relationship that lasted longest was the one where my man used to help in the house. I remember how fun it was, just the two of us going about the chores, talk of laundry, cooking... name them. Back then, most of my friends always told me that the only reason my man was helping me around was because we still hadn’t had a baby and the relationship was new. I dated this man for seven years and all through the years, he never changed. You should have seen us in the kitchen together. He would be chopping onions while I would be chopping tomatoes. In the laundry, I would wash the clothes and he would rinse them then we would both go out to air them to dry. It was such a priceless feeling.

Then came the man who just sat his behind on the couch no matter the circumstances. I would be there struggling to move his heavy mahogany dining table so that I can clean the area but all he would say was “Careful! That table was costly”. If it was that expensive, would it be better if you helped me move it? Come to think of it though, how was I going to destroy the table for me to be told to be careful? Was I going to jump on it?

If anything, the only thing he should have been worried about is me. I only weigh 53kgs, and if that table was to fall on me, I bet you I would have to spend time in hospital nursing broken bones.

That relationship never even lasted a year. Don’t even ask me why I had committed myself to cleaning his house yet we were not officially married. It was just a phase in life. I am now more mature. The only thing I can move in a man’s house before he pays my bride price are my legs.

But I promise you, men, if anyone dares pay my dowry today, I will not even wait for him to help me in the house with the chores. I will do everything single-handedly, including building the house. Okay, I am kidding; I will still need help.

Anyway, if you are a married man and you never help your woman around in the house, kindly start doing so. That gesture adds love to the union.

I know of some men who will never go to the kitchen to help prepare anything even if they get home before their women. They would rather wait till midnight for their wives to come back home and cook. Then there are those men who will want to engage you in storytelling as you break your back trying to put everything in order.

You could be having a child on your back, another one pulling your dress for attention, a banana in one hand as you try putting something in your stomach, and a broom in another cleaning the house. But your man will look at you and see no struggle but a storytelling partner to kill his boredom.

He will be there squeezing gossip out of you and expecting you to laugh at his dry jokes. By the way, if at any point I am overwhelmed with house chores and you do nothing about it, I will play deaf and dumb. No way I am laughing with you. I would rather use that energy to multitask.

Just the same way I will not sit back and watch us being thrown out of our house because of unpaid bills yet I have money. I will definitely step in and help with the bills when my man is overwhelmed.

I am not saying bills are meant for men while house chores are meant for women. All I am saying is, could we at least practice the art of helping each other in the house? 

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