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Bad boy: Why your wife must live with a few of your nasty habits

Readers Lounge By Silas Nyanchwani
Caroline is an obsessive compulsive clean freak, which means she married the wrong person, right? (Shutterstock)

When you step into the bathroom every morning, Caroline gets anxiety attacks. Because you are yet to compromise on your hard-won freedom to do as you please when taking a shower.

Like all men, you forcefully clear your throat -- to her annoyance -- and you have a habit of expelling mucus from your nose with aberrant violence that always startles Caroline to come to the door and ask you why do you do that?

“Of course, the offending stuff has to be expelled in the house, unless you want me to clear the throat and spit on the road…”

She always bangs on the door while praying on the other side, “Why did I get myself into this?” She is an obsessive compulsive clean freak, which means she married the wrong person.

On a good day, you will only come back with smelly feet, which should not be a big deal. It is not like you are dirty or something. Just normal bodily functions that stir up on a hot day. She hates the smell, and has gone the extra mile to try to cure it. Maybe she should tolerate it instead. That is more manageable.

Caroline likes order and, whereas you respect her wishes, there is no point of order in your life. If she lets you run the kitchen for the day, the mess she will come back to will have her barking like an angry bitch. She has this thing that plates have to go in one dish basin, cups in another and cutlery in a third one. But sincerely, life is too short for this nonsense. Just dump all the stuff in the sink. After all, they are all going to be washed in soap and hot water and that is what matters.

Several times, Carol has screamed at you, just because you forgot your socks on the carpet and you dropped a pair of pants on the floor instead of the dirty clothes basket. What surprises you is that you have no problem with leaving the trouser on the floor. It can be picked up by anyone at the right time to be put into the basket or taken to the laundry. And if Caroline has a problem with clothing on the floor, it is precisely her problem, she can pick it and put it in the basket. She will expend the least energy, as opposed to the energy she spends quarreling you.

The last habit that drives her completely nuts is your ability to stay quiet and zone off as soon as she starts to quarrel about these habits. It is not like you despise her or something. Rather, it is because, you want to save her energy to do something more meaningful, instead of barking at you for failing to return the shirt you don’t want to wear to the wardrobe.

Every day, you have asked yourself, what is the worst thing that can happen if the shirt actually stayed on top of the bed for the rest of the day, until she returns it to the closet in the evening if she gets to bed first?

@nyanchwani

[email protected]

#BadBoy: She always bangs on the door while praying on the other side, “Why did I get myself into this?” She is an obsessive compulsive clean freak https://www.standardmedia.co.ke/evewoman/article/2001352280/bad-boy-why-your-wife-must-live-with-a-few-of-your-nasty-habits

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