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Home / Relationships

Signs your partner is not ready for marriage

By Esther Muchene | 3 months ago | 3 min read

 Most people will string you along for years without the intention of marrying you (Photo: Courtesy)

For many people, having a fairytale wedding and a happily ever after is something they long for. And for others, a simple court ceremony suffices just as long as they get to spend the rest of their loves with their boo.

If everything were perfect, every couple would meet, date and get married with no hiccups along the way. The truth however is, couples go through so much and not everyone makes it down the aisle as soon as they would have hoped. If they even do.

Since a marriage is something sacred, you need to be absolutely sure before even considering moving towards that direction as a couple.

In case you’re wondering if your significant other is truly ready for marriage these are some of the signs you should watch out for and therein lies your answer:

  • They ignore the topic of marriage

The thought of getting married should naturally spark excitement for couples. You start to picture how your wedding day will be and get excited over some of the fun changes you will get to experience as an officially married couple.

But there might be a problem if you notice that your partner never seems to be interested in talking about marriage at all. He either sweeps the topic under the carpet or he gets irritable and totally disconnects.

And the reason could be that they’re not interested in making that kind of commitment anytime soon because they’re not ready or you’re simply not the one he wants to marry.

  • They barely include you in their future plans

A big sign that you’re heading in the right direction is, they are more focused on the ‘we’ rather than the ‘I’.

By that, I mean that the plans they make are geared towards what is best for you as a couple rather than plans that are only great for them.

If for instance they seem to be making decisions like planning to move to another country without talking to you about it, taking a job in different county or they aren’t willing to involve in their projects, you should be concerned.

 If they don't make future plans with you, you are on your own (Photo: Courtesy)
  • They are not willing to change

For sure, we know that no one is perfect. But there is still a big difference between someone who is willing to change their habits and someone who can’t see their own red flags.

The bad news here is that there is no way those bad habits will magically disappear just because you’re married.

That is why problems like partying, cheating and a flirtatious attitude outside the relationship need to be dealt with first before jumping the broom.

  • There are no plans after the proposal

There is no bigger sign that shows you’re getting married soon like a proposal. That is a public show of commitment and now everyone knows that there are some major plans on the way.

But, alas!

You have been engaged for years and years, you live together and even the children have come with no indication of a wedding.

You will start to lose the excitement and probably figure out that they might not have been ready to propose or settle down in the first place.

  • They tell you they aren’t ready

When a man tells you what is in his heart, listen. This is the most direct sign that will tell you all you need to know.

You might have thought that you can change them or they will come around only to discover you have been wasting your time all along.

You either give them an ultimatum, which may not be fair given the circumstances he told you how he feels, or you walk away. If you choose to stay do not pressure the poor man into committing when he has already told you how he feels.

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