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Little bed secret: If she is doing this, just know she faking the big O

Lady Speak

A friend of mine was telling me about her roommate’s sexual escapades. Specifically, she was complaining about how her roommate’s high-pitched “ohmygodjesusyesyes” during supposed orgasms are giving her sleepless nights. I have used the word ‘supposed’ because I want to let the male population in on a little secret; if she is being too vocal, she most probably is faking it.

Women have been faking the big O since time immemorial and the menfolk have not wisened up to their tricks. The heavy breathing, aching of her back, curling of her toes and those seemingly uncontrollable “YES (insert your name here)” are just part of a well-orchestrated ruse to help you get it over and done with and get off her so she can get some sleep or catch up on the next episode of The Good Wife.

She is not making those ungodly animal noises because she is at the height of arousal and about to explode.

She just wants to speed it up for you because her mind tuned out ages ago and now she is just bored, tired and probably experiencing pain and she wants to help finish you off so that she can relax or move on to other things. It is nothing personal really. It doesn’t mean you are not good in the sack.

Sometimes women are just too tired or distracted to reach orgasm during sex and don’t want to spoil it for you so she chooses to fake it so that you think you both had a good ending rather than hurt your feelings by telling you that she is just not feeling it.

The path to orgasm relies as much on mentality as it does on physical acts. So you can fuck all the right buttons, and hover just near or around climax for a bit, but unless your mind is completely present, it’s not going to happen.

Although there are some selfish men out there who only care about their getting off and do not give two hoots whether the woman is enjoying herself or not, most men genuinely want to please their women and will go until she climaxes.

It has been ingrained in the male psyche that they should perform in bed by pleasing their women and he wants to believe he is an ideal lover. The woman loves you and knows that her role is to reinforce that notion, so if you assume that you are pleasing her, she will dare not tell you otherwise.

However, ladies, if you fake the big O and he actually buys it, you are just doing yourself a disservice. Maybe whatever he was doing wasn’t working for you and by faking it, you are communicating that you liked what he did and he is bound to repeat it next time.

Although there is nothing wrong with giving your man a little dash of confidence with those moans and screams, honesty is always the best policy. Don’t be afraid to tell him that you are just not feeling it at that time. Believe me, his ego will be more wounded if he discovers you are faking.

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