I snooped on my husbands phone; he wants to remarry!

Dear Harold,

I regret ‘snooping’ into my husband’s mobile phone and bumping into a short text message promising to marry a woman he addressed as ‘Honey Pie’. I have been contemplating asking him about the intended marriage but also fear that he may lose his temper and kick me out despite having three children and the investments we have with him.

I honestly do not know how to approach the situation but wonder whether a man can marry another wife while in a subsisting marriage.

Lucy, Nairobi.

Dear Lucy,

Yes, your husband may be at liberty to marry other wives if he married you under customary law, which is potentially polygamous. He is not obliged to seek your permission in line with the newly enacted Marriage Act.

However, it is illegal for him to marry another woman if both of you exchanged vows either in church, garden wedding or at the Attorney General’s office and have a valid marriage certificate.

 This will amount to an offence called bigamy, which attracts a five-year jail term. Courts have also been stern on offences relating to marriage as detailed in the Marriage Act. Therefore, if you have a valid marriage certificate, both of you must divorce in court after convincing the magistrate on valid grounds for ending the union.

 It is also an offence to secretly wed after giving false declarations, details or statements for purposes of marriage. Other possible offences would include marrying under a false name towards deceiving the other party or marrying under customary law while still in an existing marriage contracted either in church, office of the Attorney General or District Commissioner.