Five subtle ways to inculcate manners in your child
By ESTHER MUCHENE | 1 month ago
Is your child acting out in ways you can’t wrap your head around? Maybe you need to take a good look at yourself.
Your child is a reflection of you and chances are they are just behaving the way you conduct yourself around them.
Therefore, if you’re not disciplined and mindful of what you say around your young ones, they will also walk the talk.
Good manners are an important part of life. For your children to be able to live with others, they must learn how to behave properly.
Although it may be a struggle for some children depending on their temperament, age and development, there are certain ways you can inculcate manners in your child without going to great lengths to do so.
Here are some tips to consider:
Your children are like clay waiting to be molded. Start early by teaching them simple vocabulary like ‘’please,’’ or ‘thank you’’ once they start talking. This should also be reflected in your own behavior because they are observant.
You don’t have to wait for them to be mature to start instilling good values in them.
It is never too early. Introduce them to other behaviors like brushing their teeth, sleeping at a certain time, reading and other positive manners at an early age.
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ii.Set an example
Mirroring the previous point, it won’t help if you’re not behaving in the kind of way you expect them to behave.
You must be mindful of how you engage with people including your spouse and how you handle conflict and situations.
This is one of the best ways to instill good manners without forcing it down their throat as they will see you acting a certain way and they will want to emulate that.
iii.Correct them politely
You’re not perfect so don’t expect perfection from your children either. They will always slip up. Instead of threatening them, keep your voice modulated, maintain eye contact and hold their hand as you correct them.
This way, they will know that you care and that is why you are correcting them. They are more likely to listen to you and learn from their mistakes.
iv.Don’t demand apologies
Let your child learn how to be accountable for their mistakes and willingly decide whether or not to say sorry. Don’t force it out of them especially if you’re dealing with a highly sensitive child.
If you think this is the way to teach them how to be polite you couldn’t be further from the truth.
Let them know how their action impacted the other person and if they choose to apologize, he or she will be doing it genuinely.
v.Be their safe space
No matter what your child has done, your immediate reaction should not be shouting, yelling or scolding them in front of others. That is a toxic reaction and will trigger your child to shut down.
Avoid shaming your child in public but rather pull them aside or wait until you get home and explain to them why what they did was wrong.
Let them know that you’re always on their side and this way, they will open up and take in everything you are saying.
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