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Girl code: Take me as I am or else just let me be

Readers Lounge By Beryl Wanga Itindi
A woman’s body “changes” fast and this shouldn't mean relationships to last shorter than an eclipse (Shutterstock)

Growing up, I often heard the saying ‘beauty is only skin-deep’. What I understood, and really believed, from this is that while someone may be drop dead gorgeous on the outside, she might not be nearly as beautiful on the inside. Now that I am an adult, I have come to understand this saying even better.

I once heard someone confidently saying the opposite -- that the beauty that matters is the one that’s visible from the outside and that a woman’s inner beauty should be left for worms! Have we now been reduced to pleasing worms?

It’s no wonder that, since time immemorial, women have turned to artificial ways of enhancing their outer beauty -- like adding extra padding in the right places. At the moment, the market is flooded with artificial hips, backsides and boobs! As if that’s not enough, we women are subjecting ourselves to wearing contraptions to reduce the circumference of their waists. Can you imagine walking around with an extra chest, butt and hips and a tummy trimmer? It is a journey through hell.

I actually call it a journey by the end of the day, I’m sure you would feel like you have been jogging from Naivasha to Kericho non-stop. It’s a miracle some of us even get back to our houses alive! Do men realise how hard it is for such a woman to balance on high heeled shoes while carrying a heavy handbag and maintaining a smile? Impossible beauty standards have made life so hard for women. Why can’t society just accept us we come?

It’s no wonder few relationships are lasting shorter than an eclipse! It must be because of how often a woman’s body “changes”. Today she has a nice round butt, tomorrow she forgets to put it on (or has it started to wither?). This week she is hippy and the next, she could be used as a ruler by an architect. Yesterday, she said yes to a marriage proposal with a full bossom and today, she is planning her wedding with a slight bump on her chest.

What happened to looking beyond what you see on the outside? I wish humanity would just learn to balance between what is on the outside what really is on the inside. I mean, why can’t you just make it a full package? Stop making it look like some of us have already lost the race even before we set our foot on the track.

Allow us to flaunt what we were given because we come in all shapes and sizes and, better still, we don’t have control of most of it. Some of us who try to take control have ended up on a permanent ‘No carbs’ diet. The nearest we can get to carbohydrates is when walking by them.

I have seen some of us drinking odd-looking, not-so-sweet concoctions in the name of trimming our tummies. I have seen women skipping meals for the same reason. Imagine getting home and preparing your family a delicious meal only to ‘eat’ it via smell. All this just so we can turn heads or fit into what the society calls ‘beautiful’.

My chest might be flatter than a plateau, my behind could be smaller than an avocado and my hips might be no-existent but, trust me, what is inside me is more than you can handle. Dear men, we come as a full package! Don’t read the ‘STOP’ sign you see on the outside. That sign is engraved in your minds. Make the bold step and make this world a better place, especially for us women.

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