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Five ways becoming a parent changes your relationship

Crazy Monday By Esther Muchene

ALSO READ: Why you need more intimacy

A union between two loving people brings a sense of security and fulfilment. When a child is brought into the picture, the dynamics of a relationship, be it in or out of marriage, change.

Generally, new parents don’t usually know what to expect in terms of their relationship when they finally plan to get a child.

While they might see how other relationships have changed once the baby arrives, even heard first-hand accounts from their friends and family, nothing really prepares you for the real deal.

In the real sense, couples and experiences are different so one post-baby experience will vary from the other.

In this piece we tackle some changes that may happen in the relationship or marriage after a baby comes into the picture.

i. Your sex life changes

At the beginning of a relationship or marriage, the sex life is usually through the roof. You had all the time to yourselves and could get away with spontaneity. However, once the baby comes into the picture, things can shift a little. Your once carefree, spontaneous evenings are now taken up with diaper changes, homework, school meetings, etc.

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The truth is, you’ll both be tired most of the time, leaving little room for intimacy. One way to fix this is by creating a schedule. This sounds crazy but many couples with kids swear by it. As the madness continues to play out in the background, this ensures that your sex life does not suffer.

ii. There is a financial shift

Generally, when it’s just the two of you, you’ll get to go on more dates as often as you wish. However, when children come, more money is diverted towards their needs. This financial shift will take place towards building a future for them.

Nevertheless, you should set aside a portion of your incomes to facilitate a date night or child-free holiday once in a while.

iii. The relationship changes

The presence of a baby brings about a shift in the relationship. Whereas previously the couple had eyes only for each other, now they have to share the attention with their baby. While this is the natural order of things, it’s important to divide the attention well so that no partner feels neglected.

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Remember when the parents are happy so is their child

iv. Emotional strain

When a woman is pregnant, her hormones can be quite something. Things that didn’t make her angry, might suddenly become an issue. For men, it can also be a stressful time because finances must be put in order so that they are well prepared for the baby. These are common issues that can cause small misunderstandings between couples. The best way to handle this is maintaining patience and calmness through this period. This ensures that stress levels are low and that the relationship doesn’t suffer during the process.

v. There is a boost in your relationship

To end on a positive note, children bring happiness and a sense of fulfilment to couples. It is an amazing experience to bring life into this world with someone you love and trust so it’s something that many people long for.

With your children in tow, you and your partner will create memories and as the years you’ll be able to marvel at of how far you have come.

Keep in mind that children cannot fix the underlying problems of a relationship however. But they can bring couples closer and strengthen the bond between them.

Photos: Shutterstock

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