Dear teenagers, old people can also get pregnant

What one thing never fails to make you feel better??

The number of teenage and early pregnancies is so much on the rise to a point that the society has sat back and assumed it is okay for our young daughters to engage in unprotected sex before marriage. We are so used to seeing expectant girls that we start talking in low tones whenever an average woman in her late thirties conceives.

I recently had a dramatic experience when I accompanied a friend for her antenatal visit. There were about 12 expectant girls and women, from their late teens or very early twenties at the reception of the hospital waiting to be attended to. When we walked in, we found them all in high spirits sharing their experiences on motherhood. It did not take us long before we joined in the conversation after being invited through questions.

They probably thought we were their age mates because of our petite body frames. It's no wonder their questions assumed we had exes and boyfriends instead of husbands! We even felt violated after one of them asked if my friend knew the father of her baby or 'anabahatisha tu'. Clearly there is something amiss with the society if these are the kind of discussions mothers have these days when they meet during antenatal visits.

About 30 minutes into the conversation, a heavily expectant woman of about 40 walked in dragging her feet like they were too heavy for her. Having gone through this a few years before, I felt for her and I knew exactly the forces behind her fatigued nature.

As soon as she sat down, the reception which was initially echoing with laughter and fun went silent. All of a sudden the young ladies started talking in low tones and stealing glances at the woman. I nearly thought she had been there earlier and had had a confrontation with them until one of the ladies turned to my friend and I and whispered, "Kwani huyu alikuwa wapi kuzaa kitambo? Mama mzima kama huyu anabeba mimba?" For a moment I thought she was talking about someone else.

Before I could even give her a piece of my mind, the woman stood and dragged herself towards the washrooms.

Once she was out of sight, there were giggles all over the place and one lady shamelessly made a nasty joke on why 'old women' should now leave the antenatal clinics for people like them. That was just about it, I felt like I had had enough of these young mothers.

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I stood up and gave them a piece of my mind. Instead of encouraging each other there and learning from each other about child care, they were busy castigating older women for rightfully conceiving and thought it wise to talk about exes and boyfriends. There are a lot of places to talk about exes and boyfriends and the clinic is just not one of them.

Dear young mothers and mothers to be, motherhood comes with a lot of responsibilities and being insensitive to others is not one of them. The society has embraced you, held your hands and guided your way. The society has fought for you to be accepted as you are, the society has refused to allow anyone to look down upon you. The best you can give this same society is to kindly fit in.

We did not take the blame from you to plant it on other women. Children are a gift from God and just like you received your gifts early in life, some of us have and will receive ours later. You do not choose when to receive a gift, you can only choose to reject it.

I salute to you all who chose to accept their gifts even when they came with no notice or messenger. You are a great lot. But don't just be a mother, act like one.