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So you had a sexcapade last night? Thanks for telling us

Lady Speak

I hate to shatter your illusions ladies, but there is absolutely no respectable way to navigate the walk of shame. None whatsoever. I came to this conclusion after I came across a lady dragging her butt back home after what I can only imagine was a wild night.

My heart went out to her. She had this disheveled appearance that made it blindingly obvious that she had spent the night shacking up with some dude.

With her tousled hair and smudged mascara, she stuck out like a sore thumb. Her little black dress must have looked delectable under the multicolored flashing lights on the dance floor, but in daylight, it looked skanky and out of context. More so because she was surrounded by morally upright citizens draped in formal apparel.

But there she was, hobbling towards the bus stop in some clunky high heels, looking like a member of the oldest profession.

She was freezing in the chilly morning air. The man she had spent the night with did not even have the decency to lend her a jacket or at the very least offer to pay for a taxi for her. What a douche!

She only had a small clutch bag with her, which was big enough to fit a phone and probably some lip gloss.

She held her head up high amid the snickering and totally disregarded the looks of utter contempt that were thrown her way. As I stood there watching her, I could not help but wonder; was the orgasm really worth it?

Granted, we have all made questionable hook-up decisions. What’s life without a bit of wild fun now and then, right? But for crying out loud, don’t set yourself up as a target of ridicule by total strangers.

Keep your promiscuity under wraps. You may put on a smile and walk radiantly, but you are fooling no one.

It is great that you have taken charge of your sex life and you are having fun, but it is best if you keep your rendezvous to yourself. Don’t display your little adventures for all to see.

I have said it time and again: If you are going to hook up with a guy you have just met, do it at your place. That way, you will avoid the dreaded walk of shame. Trust me, you will thank me later.

@RoxanneKenya www.facebook.com/RoxanneKe [email protected]

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