Inability to move on is not a crime

They say missing someone does not necessarily mean you go back to them. It could be part of moving on! Ahem! How many of you have ever been or are stuck at the stage between breaking up and moving on?

Just like mourning, moving on can also be a very traumatising season of one’s life. Someone once said men move on faster than women after a break up. I don’t know about you, but I seriously support whoever said this.

Though the earlier we move on the better, some of us still cling onto the memories hoping the wind of change would blow and overturn all the past events. You cannot force someone to move on, just like you cannot force anybody to fall in love.

The period between breaking up and moving on is always a very dramatic one. If only someone could record it all and play it later! Maybe we would laugh at ourselves and curse our actions.

Some of us refuse to accept that our partner is no longer with us and still insist on putting up their photos as our profile pictures on social media. We make impromptu visits to their houses hoping they would say “Come in babes”, shock on us, the look that we are given on arrival is equivalent to another break up.

 We leave the place more traumatized than we had visited it in the first place. We wake up on certain mornings with the imagination that we are back together and send a sweet text only to wait for the reply forever. We call them all through until our numbers are blacklisted.

We start using their surnames, clinging onto life that is lost already. The most painful part is being blocked on social media by your ex before you succeed in moving on, it only means your cries will never reach him/her.

As ladies, we sometimes go to the extent of visiting our ex parents in law hoping they would help us patch things up. Your ex mother-in-law becomes your best friend even though you could not see each other eye to eye before the break up. You suddenly turn into a puppet that is controlled by emotions. You say and do things you had never thought of doing. Things like writing such articles.

Refusing to move on is a terminal disease whose cure lies squarely in the brain of the victim. We have seen people who have even resorted to suicide or murder all because they could not move on. Some have resigned from their jobs and ventured into self-employment, working round the clock to win their exes back.

Its’ even worse if your ex has moved on and is clearly not missing or even thinking about you. You look back and curse the day you even disagreed leading to the break up. You wish you could turn back the time and do things differently.

Moving on is different in all of us.

While others can even take a day or two, others could go ten years struggling to move on in vain. I must admit I am one of those who can take forever to move on. The love that I once shared with an ex can haunt and follow me everywhere like my own shadow!

I am in that category of people who try to move on but memories of their exes haunt them and they end up venting their frustrations on whoever is trying to win their heart. I hate it when someone tries to force me to move on.

 I will move on the day I will move on. Before then, let me be the puppet I am, let me say all the stupid things I say, let me have false hopes and let me be stupid. It’s the only time I can be stupid and it will not be reflected in any report form

To all those men who try to win the hearts of ladies who haven’t moved on, woe unto you. You should be bright enough to know that someone who hasn’t moved on cannot fall in love with someone else. You can spend all the money you want on her and tell her all the sweet things you have ever said, in the long run, her heart will still be somewhere, with someone else who does not even love her!

 Love is a bitter - sweet thing, those you love dearly don’t love you back, and those you don’t even want to see could cross an ocean for you! I hope one day the scientists find a drug for moving on. I will be the first to take an overdose!