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Home / Relationships

Five tips and techniques for getting your anger under control

By Esther Muchene | 6 months ago | 3 min read

 It is super important to keep your temper in check at all times (Shutterstock)

Stress, unpleasant experiences, mean remarks and so forth, can almost always make you angry. Anyway, that is nothing to beat yourself over because we all get angry from time to time.

Anger is a normal and natural human emotion and is a reaction to hurt or frustrations.

How you deal with it is what can become a problem and major cause of concern.

Uncontrolled anger can take a toll on your health, relationships and overall life. That is why it is super important to keep your temper in check at all times.

Failure to do so can lead to aggression, health problems and regret.

There is probably that one email you should never have sent or certain words you should never have yelled at your child. That, however, is already done and you cannot undo your actions.

You must recognize that managing your anger does not mean not getting angry. It simply means finding healthy ways to cope with them and we have a few tips on how you can do that.

i.Identify the warning signs

Most people can recognize when their blood is about to start boiling. You may feel a rush of energy or an increase in heartbeat, whatever that may be, learn how your body uniquely reacts to it.

Once you’re able to know when you’re about to lose it, you can arrest those feelings and prevent yourself from getting really pissed off.

Pay attention to those warning signs and control yourself from reacting negatively.

ii.Walk away

If you easily blow up when annoyed, the best approach may be to walk away from the situation and take some time to calm down.

That short moment of solitude will help you think clearly. Breathe in, count or look at your watch before you decide to act in any way.

From there, you can express your concerns, frustrations and needs directly and in a non-confrontational way.

 Managing your anger does not mean not getting angry (Shutterstock)

iii.Know your triggers

What makes you see red? Could it be a rude receptionist, a mean co-worker or an insensitive partner? Get to the bottom of what makes you tick and how it affects you while in that situation.

This way, you can be able to find solutions. Remind yourself that anger does not solve anything and instead find ways to cope.

If you find yourself screaming at the top of your lungs because you are running late and someone cut you off, leave a few minutes early. Find ways to work around your triggers.

iv.Talk to someone

At times what you need is to talk to someone. This could be a family member or a trusted friend.

Expressing how you feel to them will do more good than venting and talking about how you hate your boss. This will actually make the problem worse and you may harbor a grudge.

Instead, talk to them about things that make you feel better and focus on solutions not the problem.

In the event your anger is getting out of control, talk to a mental health professional who is best suited to help you cope.


Things that make you happy will actually help to distract you from feeling of anger. Once your face starts getting hot and your lips start to shake uncontrollably, take a walk, have a soothing bath, listen to some music or make your self a cup of chamomile tea.

Whatever it takes to relax do it. Look for something that is easy to do and can be applied anywhere. This however will take practice but once you get used to it, it is very effective.

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