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Why women are their own worst enemies

My Man - By Tony Masikonde | September 8th 2016 at 08:54:09 GMT +0300
Photo; Courtesy

Have you ever wondered why older and younger women, and pretty and plain women, are arch-rivals? If you are a woman, when entering a room, do you immediately notice whether you are prettier, plainer, older or younger than the other women there? Do you feel guilty if you are prettier or younger than the women around you and get more attention from men? Depressed if you are not as attractive? I thought so.

Though most women hate to admit it, they still judge each other on looks, age and sex appeal.

This is terrible, but true. Women are relieved when another woman is not more attractive than they are.

A woman can be put in a tough position: She wants to dress up, she likes the positive attention she gets, but on the other hand she may risk alienating other women. What to do? There is no right answer.

In modern lifestyle, sexual rivalry is encouraged between younger women and older women. How then can a younger woman look forward to growing up or older? Isn’t it a no-brainer that she will just have to try desperately to keep looking younger? When at a party or a meeting, women often wonder who is more insecure.

The woman with the perfect make-up or the woman with the corn braids hair?

The more insecure a woman is, the more time she is likely to spend on her appearance, because she is desperate to be accepted.

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When you see a woman with outrageous attire, or a thousand and one bracelets, just know that she is looking for attention. The message she is communicating by spending so much time grooming herself is that she is searching for approval.


The one who feels and believes or has been told that she is beautiful will have minimal enhancement on her beauty. Another reason why women are their worst enemies is the relationship between married and unmarried women.

Often, the women automatically start treating (or is it mistreating?) each other differently once one of them is hooked up. Many women will all too easily drop their female friends when they get involved with a man.

Over and over, single women describe the pain they feel at being side-lined and how hard it is ‘breaking up’ with a friend they once loved.

A woman getting married or starting a serious relationship is given as the most frequent reason for a friendship ending unhappily.

It seems, too, that women prefer to stick with other women in the same relationship situation. Most married women’s best friends are married, while most single women’s best friends are single. Why?

Sometimes married women say they feel cut off from having any friends at all; other married women feel they must keep their female relationships secondary lest their husbands become jealous.

But women rarely discuss their female friendships with their husband. If these feelings were clarified, perhaps there would not be such pressure to ‘choose’ between a man and one’s best female friend.

Is this split between married and single women inevitable? My take is it definitely is. But the married women know that soon they will get pregnant and their female friends will continue looking as sexy as ever? So what happens next? They think that they can very easily lose their husbands to the single ladies.

So to pre-empt that threat, simply cut off all ties with unmarried girls hitherto in your circle.

Do you now see why women are their worst enemies?

women wrangles Kenyan women

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