I'm not saying I'm a gold digger, but I respect the hustle

I’m part sugar, part spice and a dash of controversy! Today’s topic is on dating hustlers, like that guy who’s not balling but is on his way there. Personally, I think the mentality that you should grow with someone is absolute bull and I think it’s wiser for us women to be with someone who is already made. The way the system is set up, it favors our economic interests.

Let me first get this out of the way: ambition is one of the most attractive qualities in a person in my humble opinion. If you are someone who sets high goals for yourself and strives to achieve them, you are life goals mami (or papi). That being said, I wouldn’t date someone who is still hustling. Like for example, let’s say I’m feeling this guy who’s a River-road business store owner that would one day want to own a large retail chain like Nakumatt. I will respect that guy’s vision and ambition, but from afar. There is no way I will let a relationship happen between us only until I see the first retail chain and he’s made a name and some money for himself.

Before you put a large “gold-digger” stamp on my forehead, I’d just like to explain this rationale. For those of you that follow pop culture, look at T.I and Tiny and Jesse Williams and his wife. In the case of T.I, Tiny stayed with him even as he went to prison, before he even blew up as a rapper. And what does T.I do? Cheat on Tiny with her co-workers and an Instagram model. Case 2- Jesse Williams. His wife held him down when he was a drama teacher until he blew up in Hollywood. Only for him to cheat on her with Minka Kelly. And on top of that the side-chicks for both of these guys are not one-time things, they’re long-standing relationships. There is no way I can help build a man only for him to have a long-standing affair with an Instagram thot.

Honestly this whole “ride or die” mentality is stupid, pointless and impractical. I cannot hold a man down and then when he’s successful and can get any woman he wants, he ups and leaves. Ladies think about it; it’s like a huge slap in the face. You loved this man when no one wanted him. Believed in his dreams when no one else did and supported him through everything. Only to find him spending that hard-earned money on campus girls the same age as your oldest kid. I refuse to be dogged out like that.

If you’re a guy and you have huge dreams you aspire to fulfill, kudos to you, keep working on those dreams. Trust and believe that if I am with you during the hustle and you act a fool even a little bit when we’ve both made it- I will kick you to the curb. So please, don’t holler at me until you’ve made something of yourself because I’ll definitely be more forgiving of your short-comings.