A father’s main role has majorly been taking care of the finances. But is this the only role fathers-to-be play in the arrival of their children?
Pregnancies are generally centred around the mothers and the children that are on the way. The internet is full of advice for mothers so that they can prepare for and deliver a healthy baby. For obvious reasons, mothers are the ones who mostly bear the pressure of taking care of themselves because what they do and how they feel directly affects the baby.
But on the other hand, we have the fathers. There main role has always been taking care of the finances. But is this the only role fathers-to-be play in the arrival of their children?
Here are some of the important things that men should know as they become fathers.
i. You are already a dad
Your responsibility as a dad doesn’t start when the baby is born. It starts way before that. This means that your actions need to reflect that of someone who is responsible and someone who can take care of a family. You are supposed to take charge so that your wife can also gain more confidence in you as the due date gets closer. This is crucial because how you handle things will be taken personally at this time.
ii. Your wife will be the centre of attention
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While she is pregnant, you need to get used to being in the background for a while. You have to accept it and cater to her needs. Be more understanding and put your needs aside for some time as you approach things calmly. For example, if she has cravings and wants you to pick up a certain meal at the end of the day, just get it for her. At the same time, you also need to preserve your dignity. She may be pregnant and has raging hormones but this doesn’t mean that she should mistreat you. Cater to her needs but speak up when you feel that she is crossing the line.
iii. They will both need your love
After the baby arrives, your reassurance is still very important for her. New fathers can get carried away and give all the attention to the baby. Of course, the baby needs attention but so does your wife. With work distractions and dad responsibilities, she can end up feeling abandoned and unloved. Women value reassurance and attention so even as you dote on your little one, remind your wife of how much you love her and how proud you are of her for getting through pregnancy and childbirth.
iv. She’ll need your help
In today’s world, women are taking charge more than ever. However, this isn’t the time to let her do everything on her own. Prepare for the baby so that you’ll be familiar with things like changing diapers and preparing bath water. Offer to get up at night when the baby cries so that your wife can sleep a bit more. Take the baby out to allow her some much needed ‘me time’.
v. Breaking down is okay
At some point, everyone gets overwhelmed. Keeping things bottled up can actually make you resentful and unable to support your family in the best way possible. The first few months as a new dad can be very demanding and tiresome. You might have been scolded by your wife for something that has never annoyed her before because her hormones are unpredictable. You might even feel like she’s not paying attention to you especially when the baby arrives. Add that to your own daily stress and you’re bound to feel stressed.
You shouldn’t force yourself to constantly be happy. You’ll need some breathing space so that you can cool off and also say how you truly feel. This is very essential as a father to be. If you have to, speak out and stand your ground without stepping on her toes.