The end of this year marks the dawn of another where you have a list of things to attend to and to accomplish. If among your resolutions is to get your own man, start a relationship and eventually date; despite having all it requires to be in a healthy relationship and you can start dating the first man who asks you out, you should go easy on it as not every man out there who winks at you will end up the way you so desire.
There are some men who however how hard they try, are not just meant for long term relationships or marriage. Getting into a commitment with them will either drain you or leave you wishing you were single. Such men will not only crash your New Year’s dream but will also waste a great deal your time.
Some of them include
The control freak
It feels good when your man is in control, doesn’t it? When he gets to choose what you wear, takes you out for meals in his favourite restaurants and such. What about when he starts deciding what you order and eat in those restaurants? When he starts to question the friends you hang out with and even chooses when you will talk to your family or not? There is a huge difference between a man who is in control of your relationship and a control freak. Dating a control freak means you have no say in the relationship and going against his wish could lead you into trouble, maybe even violence. Be careful not to end up with one.
It is such a good feeling to have a guy around you who does all those things you dreamt of in a life time partner. He is always there when you need him, shows up at your place and cooks for you. He offers to accompany you on all your endeavors and even chats with you every of your free minute. It however becomes too much for you when he doesn’t do anything apart from dotting on you. His entire life since you start seeing him is all about you. He4 doesn’t go out with friends, leaves work and heads directly home to you and even sneaks to your work place during lunch breaks. This kind of man is needy and with time he will definitely overwhelm you with his presence.
There’s something adorable about men who love their mothers. It is evident they have respect for women and will go an extra mile to treat you right. The big problem with dating a mama’s boy is that he doesn’t make a single decision without consulting her. He treats you right and will never hurt you but your opinion in anything, including matters of your relationship will always come after his mother’s. If the two of you want to go for a vacation, chances are he’ll first ask his mother where the perfect destination will be. You want to buy a house, his mom chooses where and when you do.
Mr. Free loader
Relationships are meant to be a two way affair. The two of you are meant to share and foot bills together without one side suffering. However, if your guy has no work or business that earns him any form of a living, he’s going to need you for everything. You will provide his food on a daily basis, pay for his TV and even his drinks when he goes out with friends. Most of the time, he will ask and expect you to cater for needs that arise impromptu and will threaten to leave you if you start to question. The free loader is so used to his way of living and will often live off someone else if you fail to provide, making it even harder for your relationship.
The under achiever
Being ready for a committed relationship means you have accomplished other steps in life like getting done with studies, securing a stable source of income and even making plans of what you want to be in the future. Hanging out with this man who has no hurry in deciding what he wants in life will not only drag you behind but also derail you from your tracks. Being around him means most of your time will be spent idling around, probably watching movies and playing video games from dawn to dusk. His hobbies have nothing related to future plans and his biggest worries probably are who beat who in last week’s match.
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The views and opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Evewoman.co.ke