Intimacy with cut or uncut men? Women speak out on their preference

Cut verses uncut men, and whether it matters, is one of the hotly debated topics in Kenya. From social to political interactions, this matter always finds its way into national discourses.

It is so serious that even politicians hardly shy away from taking to the podium to scandalise each other over it. Our politicians always resort to this topic and other trivial cultural aspects when they run out serious ideas on how to spin rhetoric.

The politics of the foreskin is not anything new in Kenya. The sultan of slurs from Gatundu thrives on it. According to his gospel, foreskins mislead the mind, and he never hesitates to quote Bible verses that refer to the cultural practice of circumcision. This has gotten him on the wrong side of the law several times.

In 2015, unapologetic former Kiambu Governor, William Kabogo was questioned by the Criminal Investigation Department for allegedly insinuating that communities that do not cut the foreskin should not produce national leaders. Meanwhile, we are yet to hear the last of why the doyen of Kenyan politics should not be president for allegedly being uncut.

The jury is still out on why a fellow man would be so interested in another man’s private parts; something that in basic logic should bother women more.

Intimacy with cut and uncut men

Crazy Monday sought the opinion of women on this matter. Just how much importance do they attach to the foreskin or lack thereof?

Politics of the foreskin is a big deal even among women. Not long ago, a 39-year-old Bungoma man was forcefully cut in broad daylight after his wife reported him to the elders. The oblivious man woke up to a crowd outside his house — solely there to have him undergo the all-important cut. How humiliating and embarrassing for a father of 11 to undergo the cut under the glaring eyes of hundreds of strangers! The wife was later quoted saying she did not regret leaking out that top secret to elders.

A big number of women interviewed by this writer are very skeptical about dating or marrying an uncut man. Stigma on the uncut men is real if comments on social media on the issue is anything to go by. Most of the trolling is based on myths and stereotypes about the foreskin; raging from an uncut man cannot maintain good hygiene to how inconveniencing and cumbersome the foreskin would be during coitus.

Kate Wanja*, a salonist in Nairobi, says she cannot touch an uncut man, not even with a 20-feet pole. A sentiment shared by many other women this writer talked to while preparing this report.

“In my culture, an uncut male is a boy even at the age of 50! I cannot date or marry a boy! My father and uncles would even find it as insult!” says Wanja*, quick to add that she won’t even try to imagine sleeping with such a ‘boy’.

When love overcomes culture

Wanja* and other women point out that they would try to convince an uncut man to face the knife any day if they really wanted to settle down with them. Love overcoming tradition? Quite interesting. Eunice*, a Nairobi-based lab technician, reveals that she forced her boyfriend from the lake to go against his traditions and face the knife after she threatened to dump him.

“I used to enjoy intimacy, but I was so worried about contracting an infection after reading articles about uncut men being at a higher risk of getting infections and passing them on to their partners. I threatened to dump him. And true to form, he went for the cut,” she reveals.

For a few others it is a non-issue. Take, for instance, Esther, a graphics designer. To her, cut or uncut, she doesn’t mind. “I don’t understand what the fuss is all about. It’s not a big deal to me. It’s a non issue in as far as dating, marriage or even leadership is concerned,” she says.

If a spot check by Crazy Monday on the streets of Nairobi is anything to go by, then most Kenyan women prefer cut men. However, unlike in Kenya and perhaps other parts of Africa where most women prefer men who’ve undergone the cut, in the Western world things are different. Surprisingly, women there detest cut men. Most argue that the cut reduces a man’s sensitivity, thus poor response during intimacy.

Interesting, there are many medical reports which back up these sentiments. Scientific and medical reports show substantial benefits of the cut, some that get brushed off, anyway.

For instance, medics say cut men have reduced chances of contracting sexually transmitted diseases, penile cancer and making their female partners get cervical cancer.

Myths, stereotypes, pros and cons aside, the jury is (still) out on whether or not the cut is that important.