A Family that plays together, stays together

There is a plan for a family fun day forming in my mind. I am not talking about a family gathering/reunion – that is being organised by one of my relatives and should bring together as many extended family members as possible, some of who have not met for more than five years. There is sure to be lots of good food accompanied by introductions and re-introductions, catching up amid much laughter, excited exclamations of "Oh my goodness, you've really grown! I last saw you when you were...." There will very likely be speeches, prayers, a sermonette, church songs as well as a deejay for those who may want to exhibit their dancing skills. The older folks will sit together, perhaps inside; the younger generation will gather around a table or two outside, the younger one after that will probably be in the TV room staring at their phones and chatting occasionally about the latest trends, and the youngsters will be running around the compound fuelled by a mixture of soft drinks. These are wonderful events because they bring family together and help the younger ones learn about their heritage. And as we like to say after the introductions, "Now I will not pass you on the streets like a stranger." As much as I am looking forward to this event at the end of this month, it is not what I have going on in my mind. In addition to bringing family together to catch up, the fun day I am planning will also include mental as well as physical activities that will get people thinking, laughing, jumping, running, dancing and so on. The last one we had some years ago went very well despite initial resistance from the older generation. They wanted to do what they were used to doing every time we met– sit around eating and drinking and chatting about politics, the economy and business (I'm sure you can guess I'm referring to the men!). It was interesting to watch their reluctance slowly turn to interest after a few mind games that they won effortlessly, by which time their competitive juices had been stirred up. Soon they were joining the rest of the gang skipping, organising the four-by-around-the-house relays race and creating interesting obstacles for the obstacle race. Part of the fun was the unpreparedness and subsequent improvisations. For instance, some of the women had come in heels and opted to borrow their husbands' shoes for the running races. This became a double challenge – trying to keep the shoes on while running at a respectable pace because, after all, the objective was to win! The relay race around the house raised the most laughter and excitement – we decided to populate the different teams by size rather than age. We still have a video showing one of the 'plus size' team members walking around the house in search of a team mate who seemed to have lost her way. When they met, they both burst out laughing and for a full minute were bent over with tears streaming down their cheeks. Then the formerly 'lost' team member finished the race and the other one took over with great zeal, running to the best of her ability around the house. The team came last, but at least they finished. And we had a really good laugh. Everyone agreed that it was a great day and wanted a similar event soon. The next fun day we enjoyed about two years later was not planned. We were upcountry for Christmas and after stuffing ourselves with lunch, we all went outside for a lazy afternoon on the grass. Some of the kids were idly playing with a ball and occasionally an adult would throw it back when it strayed. Out of nowhere, a game emerged – a sort of handball match without goals. The teams were a mixture of children and adults and grew as the spectators joined the side they felt was losing unfairly. Because people joined the game at any point, it was not always clear who was on your team, and sometimes you ended up passing the ball to the 'enemy'! And there were no rules so all kinds of sneaky tricks were used to get the ball. The game went on for hours – much to the kids' delight – and ensured that people slept very well that night (from fatigue) and woke up with very sore muscles. Family fun days fulfill two objectives – they bring people together in a relaxed atmosphere but more importantly, adults are humanised in children's eyes. When they see their parents, uncles and aunts running, jumping, falling and laughing, they are reminded (or realise for the first time) that we are people who are actually approachable. Isn't that what we're always hoping for?