At what age should you buy your child a phone?

Last week, the Saturday Standard ran a very disturbing story of a teenager who had disappeared from home after her mother confiscated her phone. The mother was concerned that the 13-year-old is a KCPE candidate yet she was spending too much time on WhatApp.

When the mother did that, in protest, the girl ran away from home and left a goodbye note telling the parents not to look for her. The note went on to say that she is a big girl and she can take care of herself.

As a parent, that story broke my heart. I pray the girl comes back home safe and sound. The incident brought to the fore the issue of parenting and disciplining of children.

First, I am certain that the girl's parents meant well when they bought her a phone. They never imagined that she could be so hooked on it, it would end up being disastrous.

By also confiscating the phone, the mum meant well because she wanted her daughter to spend more time on what matters, studying. But the poor child got all this twisted and ran away from home. So who is to blame for this whole mess?

Some people have blamed the parents saying they spoilt their child and now they are crying over spilt milk. Others are of the view that the parents did no wrong and this is just one unfortunate incident that could have happened to any parent. I will not judge.

But what comes out strongly is the challenge of parenting our children in this era of technological explosion. While our generation was not exposed to technology until we were adults (I got my first cell phone when I joined campus and I interacted with a computer in second year) these modern day children, technology is part and parcel of life.

And this sinking reality brings the question; at what age should we buy our children phones?

"As early as Form One," one of my friends commented when I posted the question on my Facebook posts. Another parent friend fired back, "For what? To call her boyfriend? That is how we spoil our kids and make them feel entitled."

And this sparked off varied reactions. What came out clearly from the thread of conversation is that children should not be bought for phones until they are adults, 18-year-old and above. That is when they are mature and empowered enough and they know the consequences of having such a gadget on their hands.

Of course there were liberal parents who were of the view that children as young as 10 years deserve a phone so that "mummy and daddy can always communicate with them while they are at work."

Every parent is entitled to their view. But for me, I think we need to go back to the basics on matters parenting when raising kids, from day one. Yes we have been told that the children of nowadays are different and special and deserve to be parented as such, but then again the principles of parenting have never changed and they work for children born in 1950s and 2017. I rest my case.