Something happened the other day that left me with a guilt feeling. I forgot to give my son Troy his dose of antibiotics one night. Immediately I realised it, I wallowed in a valley of self-condemnation and guilt for the next few days.
Negative thoughts flooded my mind: “What kind of a mother would forget to give their child crucial medication like antibiotics knowing fully well the importance of adherence. I must be a really nasty mother?”
I was so depressed at work. But at some point, I decided enough was enough and I would not condemn myself for my actions again. I switched off the negative talk.
I am sure several career mums have had such moments of throwing stones at themselves for something they feel they did horribly wrong.
Heck, we are only humans who sacrifice a lot and are always under pressure to perform. Even super men sometimes forget even important assignments and commitments. But for some reason, high achieving career mothers have taken this false tag of super mums that they have everything put together.
But I am slowly realizing that I am no super woman. I am just a normal mother trying to juggle a million roles and trying to remain sober while at it. Truth be told, sometimes it is overwhelming.
The circumstances that led to me to forgetting to give baby his medication is very understandable, but here I was crucifying myself. That day, I recall I had piles of workload and reports that had to be submitted the next day, so I had to put in more hours at work.
I arrived home after 11pm and baby was asleep. I could have requested my housegirl to do it, but I forgot because my mind was clogged. When I reached home, I only had strength for having a bath and going to bed.
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As career mothers, there are times when we get so tired, we just want a good rest. We carry so much on our backs that sometimes we just need to pat ourselves on the back.
We play the role of nurse, chef-in-chief, counsellor, cheer leader, finance manager, house manager, you name it.
Every day you have to check the children’s home work, sign the diary, mark all their important dates and make them special; plan what will be cooked every day (woe unto you if you have a housegirl who cannot think on her feet), the list is endless. Back at work, you have to excel and look dapper. You are not allowed to bring your tantrums to work. Nobody cares.
Going forward, as mums, we need to pat ourselves on the back for what we are doing and sometimes just be selfish so that we can enjoy ourselves. So from today, remove that perfectionist tag and just play your roles with good intention, purpose and balance. And don’t forget to delegate.
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