Confessions: My boyfriend is too fast in bed and can't satisfy me

Dear Coleen

My boyfriend never fully satisfies me in bed. Whenever we have sex he rolls over and gets up as soon as he’s finished! He basically satisfies himself and doesn’t seem bothered whether he pleases me at all.

Also, he is very quick – we’re talking a few minutes – and he knows I can’t orgasm that fast. Is he lazy or is he just being selfish?

Coleen says:

I think he’s incredibly selfish and clearly doesn’t understand a woman’s body or emotions at all. I hope it is just a case of him being ignorant and selfish as opposed to not even caring what you want.

If it’s the latter, then things aren’t going to change.

If he does care then he’ll listen to you when you tell him what you do want in bed and he’ll make the effort to please you.

You need to say to him, ‘I love you, but I’m not getting any enjoyment from sex’. I think

you need to be brutally honest at this point.

The two of you need to work on building intimacy inside and outside the bedroom. Right now there’s little communication and it’s a case of wham bam, thank you, ma’am.

He’s not getting the message at the moment and, in my opinion, he shouldn’t be getting any until he does get it!