1. Do your friends believe in marriage? How can they be your support system if they don't believe in the institution?
2. Are your friends faithful and do they treat their spouses well? Most married people get to cheat on, mistreat and devalue their spouse because of their friend's influence.
3. Do your friends respect your spouse or do they belittle, insult and ridicule your spouse? Why are you surrounding yourself with people who don't honour your life partner, the mother/father of your children?
4. Are your friends good examples to your children? Can you trust your friends with your children or do you have double standards, telling your children to have good company yet you entertain bad company?
5. Is your spouse comfortable with your friends? Or have your friends become an issue in your marriage, pulling you two apart, making your spouse feel you are siding with your friends?
6. Are your friends of the opposite gender honourable or do they flirt with you? Are you doing things with your friends that your spouse is finding inappropriate but then you cover it all up? Most affairs start off as friendships that are passionately defended.
7. Are your friends stealing your family time? Do your friends keep making plans outside home for to regularly be apart from your family? Are you coming home late often exhausted or drunk spending less time with family to be with friends who most likely won't be in your life years to come?
8. Are your friends ruining your family finances by draining you, using you, encouraging you to squander family wealth on dubious deals, alcohol or gambling or do your friends challenge you to do better financially for your family?
9. Can you count on your friends to help you find solutions when you have marital problems or are they quick to mislead you, gossip about your spouse and incite you to leave?
10. Do your friends look out for you and your spouse and correct you and confront you when you are messing up your marriage or do they see you walking into fire and say "It's none of my business"?
11. In case anything happens to you, can you trust your spouse and children with your friends?
12. When your friends visit your home, does your spouse feel bad and uneasy or does your spouse welcome them because they are good for you and the family?
13. Do your friends add you to fishy online Groups of porn, cheating, sexcapades, hook ups, sexism and corrupt dealings that goes against what your marriage stands for? Why are you opening up doors that will cost you your marriage?
Friends can break or shape your family, surround yourself with the right ones.
© Akello Oliech and Dayan Masinde
In my book, MANHOOD SERIES, I walk with men through the journey of understanding themselves and their woman.
In my other book, WOMANHOOD SERIES, I walk with women through the journey of self-discovery and their relationship with men.
To purchase the MANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word MAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.
To purchase the WOMANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word WOMAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer