The last thing wives and girlfriends would ever want to hear is ‘side chic’. It stirs up all sorts of negative emotions when you hear that someone found out her man has a side chic and it can even make you start suspecting your partner.
As much as women champion togetherness, girl power and all that rosy stuff, we can’t look past the fact that sometimes women are their own worst enemies. And if this wasn’t true, side chics wouldn’t even be a real thing.
Women often wonder what it is that a man gets from his plan B that he’s not getting from his wife. And this can be very painful especially if you started building with your man from scratch only for some random lady, or maybe even a close friend or worse, a relative, comes to ruin what you have.
Not a new phenomenon, this is quite common and cuts across the board. Young, rich, married, Christian, whatever the case may be, some men are built for the streets and from research, here is what they get from it:
· Free sex
Some men just aren’t satisfied with what they’re getting at home even when they have everything. His wife might try and dress sexily and do backflips in the bedroom yet he will still want more. They love that their side chicks can do things their wives and girlfriends can’t or won't.
This can also happen when men aren’t getting enough sex from their partners; like when they’re too busy for each other or during those tough seasons where they’re butting heads.
Also, there is the fact that before social media and mobile phones, it took quite some effort to cheat and men could refrain because of the hassle. Nowadays, women are hypersexual, dress provocatively and literally throw themselves at men making it extremely difficult for them to resist. This is especially if he’s not in a good place with the Mrs, or they simply can’t exercise self-control.
· Ego boost
When a man is able to get a lot of women, he’s seen as an alpha. He gets false affirmation and praise from his circle when he can juggle the wife or girlfriend with other multiple women comfortably without either ever finding out.
When he’s hanging out with friends who approve of having a side chic, he can get free bragging rights. He’s seen as someone who calls the shots because they will pretend when his wife is around and accommodate his side chic when she’s not.
A common reason why men choose to have one is for fun and friendship. While his wife is busy sacrificing her time taking care of the kids, preparing his meals and catering to him, it’s obvious that she won’t always have time to enjoy life.
Some wives and girlfriends also happen to spend more time at work than with their families.
When he becomes desperate for intimacy and companionship, he will go hang out with his ‘mpango wa kando’ because she has all the time to prepare his favourite meals on his tab, give him massages and party with him.
This is probably one of the most common reasons men give other than free sex. Many guys don’t want to deal with constant nagging, belittlement and silent treatments, and would rather hang out peacefully with someone who isn’t hostile.
However, this runs deep. The reason why the wife or girlfriend could be acting up is that he may have done or said something that made her unhappy, she may have found out he’s cheating and the list continues.
In short, no woman wants to be at loggerheads with anyone leave alone her man. There is always a root cause for her unpleasant behaviour.
· She’s his ‘just in case’
Some guys also want to have someone to go to in case things fall apart with their girlfriend or wife. They say that women are unpredictable sometimes and they want to have a safety net to fall on.
They basically feel like they won’t have to start over with someone new if things don’t work out.