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Relationship expert Jennifer Karina warns that scheduling sex is a sure way to kill intimacy.
“Sex is important in marriage, but when you start scheduling it, then as a couple, you are losing it. Sex should be spontaneous. Sex should be through mutual respect and give a couple mutual satisfaction. The younger you are, the more you need it. But as you get older, the frequency reduces,” says the holder of a degree in business administration and counselling psychology.
She notes that when sex is scheduled, and one partner can’t keep up with the programme, its starts creating confrontation in marriage. She says scheduling for sex can’t work because intimacy is dependent on so many factors.
“Factors like moods, hormones, fatigue, and expectations make scheduled sex very difficult. But if as a couple you think scheduling sex works for you, then go for it. These things are not cast in stone and different couples have different preferences,” says Karina who has been married for 35 years.
However, she admits that scheduled recreational intimacy can actually help a couple reignite their love.
“Scheduled intimacy is simply planning to spend time with your loved one. This can be through romantic dinners, picnics or any activity which both partners enjoy. Thereafter, if sex gets in the mix, the better. But it doesn’t have to end up with sex,” says the recipient of the Women Leadership Achievement Award.
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