Will all the real husband material please stand up!

"Mama Tasha, I am tired of dating lousy men in the hope of getting a husband. Now I just want a baby and I'm done!" that was the confession of a very dear girlfriend we shall call Karen. She is a few months shy of celebrating her 40th birthday, but luckily, she has it all — almost.

My girl has those posh jobs which come with a corner office, reports directly to the CEO, drives those posh cars people admire in traffic and lives in those high end addresses where expatriates jog with their dogs every morning. You get the picture. Karen best captures the meaning of well accomplished.

As you may have guessed, what is missing in Karen's picture-perfect life is a husband and children. According to her, the dating scene is so messy and unpredictable, it's virtually impossible to get a nice guy. Even after eliminating all the requirements she had listed for a Mr Right, there still seems nobody who can meet the basic requirements.

"Mama Tasha these men are impossible. When you get one who is educated and has a decent job, you discover he cannot let go of his bottle. When you get one who meets all the requirements in your list plus he is tall, dark and handsome, you discover he's a serial cheater.

When you finally drop your demand and settle for the kawaida John who is less-educated than you and is a hustler running some stupid startup, you realise he has serious self esteem issues that suffocate you.

So I am done," that was Karen as we were catching up over lunch one afternoon. After a futile search for a husband, she has made up her mind and is only looking for a child, even if it means going to a sperm bank.

"I am a big girl. I can take care of myself and my needs. I mean if I want good sex I know where to get it. My only desire is a child."

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That is the stage many super stable career women have reached. They are more than ripe for marriage — they are educated, have good jobs, look fabulous for their age, but there are no decent men to 'put a ring on it'.

The men they are getting are perennial losers, disgusting hyenas, lazy Ben 10s, serial cheats and womanisers and lousy lovers with low self-esteem, they cannot even engage in simple conversation without feeling threatened by the woman's success.

So where are the good men? Good men who can engage a successful woman in a decent conversation for just an evening without getting intimidated by her success. Good men who have some basic education — even a D minus — some manners and sense of humour to make a girl laugh herself silly.

A man who can walk you to your car and will not tremble like a chicken when they realise you drive a sleek Porsche yet he drives an old jalopy. Will the real men please stand up?

The writer is a married working mother of a toddler boy and a pre-school girl. She shares her experience of juggling between career, family and social life.