Nine months of our lives!
If human beings were in a position to edit the Ten Commandments, I would be the first in line to add one more. Thou shall not let your woman go through the nine months of pregnancy alone!
If only God would make some men feel what expectant women feel during pregnancies, maybe they would zip their trousers and practice secondary virginity forever.
As much as everyone is always up in arms saying pregnancy is not a disease, I beg to differ. It could be to a terrible ‘disease’ to others, maybe even fatal. How many people have we lost due to pregnancy complications?
Not only complications arising from changes in the body but also those that arise from external forces. Sometimes I sit down and wish pregnancy could be carried in currency form so that it can always circulate in different hands until it’s due. Maybe that way, some women would not feel the pressure all alone.
Men, if you are responsible for planting a seed inside a woman, make it your duty to walk the woman through the pregnancy. The physical and emotional changes sometimes go to the extremes and when one faces them all alone, all she hopes for is the second coming of the Messiah so that everything comes to an end.
Men should at least be there during the pregnancy even if they plan to take off after delivery. Sometimes I commend some men for pretending to still be in love with their expectant partners just to hold their hands through the journey then disappear after the bundle arrives.
Such men are better off than those who go to exile from the moment they learn that they are about to join fatherhood. Then they are the first in line to celebrate Father’s Day when the time comes!
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The baby stays in the mother’s womb for nine months once. If you did not walk your partner through a pregnancy, there is never a chance to make it up.
You can play all the roles required after the birth of the baby but you will never fill the gap you left during the nine months.
These same nine months will never vanish from a woman’s memory come what may. Of course, some pregnancies are always a walk in the park with no physical complications, but no pregnancy is free from emotional torture as long as the man responsible plays dead and buried.
The nausea, the morning sickness, the fatigue, the body changes, sometimes even the negative societal view brings a woman down. Leave alone the man’s absence.
There are also the happy moments that come within the nine months, moments all women dream to share with their partners, the baby kicks. It hurts when only one partner experiences the kicks.
The late night insomnia that comes with the need to be embraced and told all will be well. All of a sudden the nights are so cold and lonely, leave alone scary. The anxiety of the labor when it is about to kick in.
Eventually, going through the labor without the once love of your life. Of course, a woman may have all the friends and relatives to give her the push when the baby announces its arrival, but that does not fill the gap of the man responsible. There is always that missing link that puts everything in place at that moment.
If only we were allowed to edit the Ten Commandments! But then again, we break them every day, so it wouldn’t make a difference anyway.
Maybe some men should just carry the pregnancy for the first two trimesters as we make a holiday trip to Jamaica in preparation for the final sprint.