Getting back the groove in your romance

Last week, my husband told me he was taking me out for dinner. This was such a surprise, as those who regularly read my column know that my hubby hardly does such things. I’m married to Mr ‘Unromantic’. So now you understand why being told I’m being taken out for dinner was a big deal.

I spent a lot of last year whining about the fact that we don’t go out for dinner and do other ‘romantic’ things like other couples.

Despite being married to the same man for more than ten years, I still, once in a while, feel that I need some romance in my life. I whined and whined but I didn’t get even one dinner date because he has this way of explaining to me why it won’t happen. Ok, I know I should know that by now but I don’t!

So as the dinner date day approached, I was in a panic because traffic was so bad and I kept waiting for him to tell me that if traffic is bad, we will have to cancel.  All the more because he has serious intolerance to traffic snarl-ups. Surprisingly, he never mentioned it once.

When the day came, there was hardly any traffic so we went to this really nice restaurant — my favourite type. We had a great time just catching up, being waited upon instead of us waiting on the children back at home as usual. The food was very good, service was excellent, and everything went on smoothly.

When we got home I was so happy that my hubby became suspicious.  I took that opportunity to remind him that I thrived on this type of thing. I also gave him a few more tips, which I imagine Mrs Unromantics can identify with, hoping that he had finally gotten the message.

To be able to have meaningful conversations, it means not reassuring me that you’re listening when I can see that you’re 100 per cent focused on the TV. The other day, our daughter gave my hubby a hard time about the fact that she was talking to him and he was watching sports. It was interesting watching my husband try to explain that he was listening when he couldn’t explain to her what she had said two seconds ago!

For your husband to woo you just like when you were courting, arrange a weekend away without children, house helps, phones and all other things that make intimate conversation and intimacy a difficult thing to achieve.

A touch or a gentle word also goes a long way. Hold my hand as we walk the streets. Help me up, down and across places that need jumping or wide steps.

I could go on and on but I am a believer in measurable and achievable goals. So I will work on these first.

Photo Credit: msdelaleu.com