A couple of weeks ago, I experienced what the sexologists call “a continuous orgasm”- my first ever. Even as experienced and open as I am about these things, when it happened I was so confused and didn’t even understand what was going on in my body. It felt like a seizure, the kind you want to have again and again. The kind of thing that makes you lose sense of your entire body and for a second, your spirit leaves your Body, ascends into the realm of peak pleasure before coming back home and helping you regain some composure. I’ll save all the rest of the savvy details for my erotic fiction novel but I’m just curious about how many women never get to experience the feeling of climaxing with their partner inside of them.
I came across some research by Dr. Kim Wallen, president of the “International Academy of Sex Research” so you know he’s credible. So he hypothesises that the reason a lot of us women never get to reach climax during penetration is because of the distance between the clitoris and the vagina. Ideally, the shorter the distance, the easier it is for us to reach climax because each stroke stimulates the clitoris directly. However, only 10 to 15 percent of women actually have a reasonably short distance between these two parts so they’re the few who don’t have to pull Kamasutra stingos to reach orgasm.
What’s interesting though is that people are too hush-hush about this, including us women. A guy will come over, romp your sheets, sweat all over you and nothing. No leg-shaking, back-breaking orgasm. It’s even worse for the women who dare to fake their orgasms, which is really funny because we are simply doing a disservice to ourselves. Don’t make that guy think he’s some prime-cut steak when he’s just matumbo ya 20bob. Let’s try to be honest when the sex just isn’t doing it and try and come up with creative ways to make the sex fun for all parties involved.
I’ll leave you with this; Peggy Orenstein gave one of the most incredible TED Talks that touched my soul. It was about us as women changing our mentalities with regards to our sexual pleasure. It is just as important for him to reach orgasm as it is for you. Have a listen and hopefully it will impart in you the same confidence it gave me to refuse sub-standard loving.