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Understanding polyamorous relationships

 Polyamorous relationship involves partners who can have involvements with other people (Shutterstock)

Still somewhat of a taboo, understanding how anyone would want to be in a non-monogamous relationship is something society is yet to embrace and fully accept.

Polyamorous relationship involves partners coming to an agreement that they can have other romantic and sexual involvements with other people.

Unlike open relationships where you are committed to one person but can have sex with other people, in a polyamorous relationship you can have multiple committed relationships with other people.

Crazy right?

Well, according to those who practice these type of relationships their claim is all about spreading love.

Here are a few other things you may not know about this type of relationship that may leave you scratching your head for a minute.

  • It is not about sex

Although partners in a polyamorous relationship can see and have relationships with multiple people, sex is not the focus.

Just like a monogamous relationship that grows from friendship to a serious commitment, polyamorous relationships are about pursuing meaningful connections.

In the event where sex is involved, it is not about enjoying sex with all those you’re with together.

If for instance a woman is in a relationship with three men, she will be intimate with all three or two only one at a time and not together like it may be in the case of a swinger couple.

  • It is not considered cheating

Contrary to what many may think is cheating, polyamorous relationships are about having open and honest agreements with regards to the moral code each partner must follow.

It is all about consent and disclosure. Unlike infidelity, extramarital affairs or adultery, all partners involved are very much in the know who their partner is with.

 Polyamorous relationships are about having open and honest agreements (Shutterstock)
  • There is a hierarchy

Considering how serious one couple’s connection may be, some take more priority over the rest.

For instance, the primary partner is the one you are married to, have kids with and live together.

A secondary partner on the other hand may be someone you see and communicate often but don’t share bills or live together although you are both committed to each other.

  • The green monster is a huge problem

Think about it, you’re home alone over the weekend while your primary partner is out on a date with another person and you don’t know whether or not they will have sex.

Well, those are some of the issues polyamorous couples have to deal with.

Coming up every time, jealousy is an emotion that has to be dealt with almost every time when one partner begins to feel neglected or ignored.

  • Boundaries have to be set

Considering the confusion this type of arrangement comes with, if couples don’t set rules to act as guidelines, there will be a lot of broken hearts and dreams.

Couples must discuss what is allowed and what isn’t. For instance, is having sex with a secondary partner allowed but no holding hands in public?

Can the secondary partner visit your shared home so long as no displays of affection are shown? Or worse still, can you have relationships with members of the same sex or strictly members of the opposite sex?

Until all these issues are resolved it will be almost impossible to sustain a polyamorous relationship.

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