Shock as bribe meant to ensure Kenya is ranked among least corrupt gets stolen

That Kenya is a bandit economy, with all the three arms of government run by cartels is no secret.

As Kenyans are still reeling from shock of suspected massive corruption at the Judiciary, reports have now emerged that the money meant for bribing a transparency tracking organisation to rank Kenya favourably on the list of most corrupt countries was stolen.   

“My friend, this country is very corrupt. Would you believe the bribe meant for the transparency guys so as to rank Kenya as least corrupt was stolen?” a source told this writer.

Panic-stricken National Image Corporation of Kenya (NICK), which received the money and was to approach the recipient, is at pains to explain where they took the bribe. The Ethics and Anti-Corruption Agency has now been called in to carry out investigations.

Sharing loot

Explaining the scandal, a senior NICK official who fell out with his colleagues over the formula for sharing the loot said he is ready to appear as a witness at a yet to be set up commission of inquiry.

“Kenyans had very good intentions when they created this body. They wanted to banish the corrupt image that has been formed of us internationally by bribing the people who compile the rankings. But then, some unscrupulous people decided to have all the money to themselves,” said the official who spoke on condition of anonymity.

With the bribe money estimated to have been in the range of billions, a lot of questions remain unanswered as to how such a huge amount of money could have disappeared so easily. Senior officials at NICK are now under pressure to resign.

Pure politics

“We can’t keep paying taxes meant to bribe anti-corruption bodies to improve our image only for that money to enrich rotten government officials,” said an angry Kenyan. But NICK officials were adamant that no money had been misused or lost.

“All this is pure politics. Our tribes are being targeted. It is unfair that we have sacrificed so much to improve this country’s image by being at the forefront of bribing for the sake of the country, but then you turn around and vomit on our shoes... you ungrateful lot.” said another senior NICK official.

A Parliamentary Committee on scandals of this nature has also been dragged into the debate. The committee is questioning how such a huge amount of money was spending, yet there are no results to show for it. The committee has summoned all top NICK officials.

Reports have it that the auditor general is compiling a report, detailing how the funds were misappropriated. On the other hand, parliament has apologised to Kenyans for even allocating money to NICK and vowed that this year they will not allocate even a single cent until the officials are jailed.

Stolen bribe

“Besides the stolen bribe, which they have to return, they should also pay back all the salaries they have earned. I mean, they have not been working but swindling Kenyans. They have been taking Kenyans for a ride as if they are politicians. How dare they?! These are mere civil servants!” said one visibly angry legislator.

And amidst the cloud of dust that has been raised over the matter a lot of questions are also being asked especially regarding how the top officials at NICK were hired.

“Due process was not followed when they were being hired. Were they vetted for integrity?” wondered an anti-corruption expert.

Frustrated citizens are now calling for new ways to fight corruption including hiring witchdoctors from Tanga and Zanzibar.

“If they can make petty thieves eat grass, then chances are they can make corrupt government officials do so!

‘‘Let us try witch doctors now that nobody seems ready to fight graft. At this rate, corruption will finish us. We are now told medics get bribes to refer patients to India? Good Lord!” noted one wag.