Reasons why many women no longer enjoy making love even with their husbands

That's because they feel getting intimate is all the man wants from her. They feel the man treats her good, as a manipulative tool to get her to make love. Women hate feeling like sex objects.

Sadly, we have made dates to mean the precursor that happens before making out. Dates have largely lost meaning from sharing a special time to the dramatized sweet nothings a man and woman do to make love.

When was the last time you went out on a real date?

When was the last time you went out on a real date, not hooked up just to get intimate? When was the last time you set up time with someone you like/love and making love was not the agenda?

When was the last time you went out on a picnic, a walk? When you sat down close to each other and really talked? Observed the moon as you talked and opened up, prayed, cried, asked each other spirit and heart questions and felt understood?

When was the last time you dressed for a date to be free and comfortable, not dressing up seductively for sex?

When was the last time you looked into each other's eyes and paid attention to each other, nothing sexual? When was the last time you touched or held not to say "Let's make love" but "I love you"?

When was the last time the woman felt warm in her heart and the man felt he can relax and be attended to? When was the last time you two laughed, smiled, blushed, sang together, rubbed each other's nose, played with each other's fingers?

When was the last time you two talked, not about your ex, sex styles or how tough life is but unveiled each other, searching the secrets of the heart?

When was the last time you walked home hand in hand or drove home exchanging sweet glances, rubbing hands in traffic jam? The man kisses her to say "Goodbye" when she reaches home and doesn't insist on getting intimate? A date is not a precursor to getting intimate, it is a window to know each other. When was the last time after a date, she smiles missing him and he texts her saying "I am home safe" with both feeling wow, pure and understood?

Married couple, when was the last time you two dressed up and went out as soul mates? When was the last time you were more than husband and wife but best friends? When was the last time you took time out to enjoy each other, not to talk about your children, bills or responsibilities but about your love for each other? When was the last time you ended that date looking into each other's eyes, cuddling as you whisper "Years down the line, I love you even more"? When was the last time you two cuddled to sleep after the most intimate pillow talk?

When was the last time a date was two hearts knowing each other? Not two horny people hooking up for an orgasm and leave each other empty? When was the last you truly felt loved and listened to? You will miss out on a lot if you focus on just sex.

Let's go back to special moments that are not eroded or camouflaged by the chase of an orgasm.

© Dayan Masinde

In my new book, MANHOOD SERIES, I talk about how it is the man's responsibility to make his woman feel searched out, pursued, attended to and special.

In my other new book, WOMANHOOD SERIES, I talk about how women have more to offer than sexual appeal and how attractive it is when a woman is deep, stimulating, spiritual, challenging, inspiring and conversational.

To purchase the MANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word MAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.

To purchase the WOMANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word WOMAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.