Woman shares eye-opening list of things she's had to learn after marrying a Black man

Following George Floyd's tragic death in the US, people took to the streets all around the world to protest and share support for Black Lives Matter.

Social media was also awash with this powerful message for weeks after, but unfortunately people seem to be talking about it less and less now.

But just because the hashtag has stopped trending, doesn't mean racism has stopped.

This is something one woman recently highlighted on Facebook, in a post which offered people a "small glimpse" into the "intentional and unintentional racism that happens everywhere, all the time".

Pamela Chandler, a white woman from West Carrollton, Ohio, took to social media to share a list of all the things she's had to learn since marrying her husband, Walter, who is a black man.

The post is eye-opening, showing how the family has to consider the outcome of almost everything they do on a daily basis - even something as simple as going to the supermarket.

Pamela explains: "If Walter is pushing the cart I always have to have my receipt ready when leaving the store."

As well as this, the mum admits that whenever they leave their local area, she has to drive the car.

"We don’t talk about it each time, we just both know that if we are leaving our general 'safe' area and heading to smaller town Ohio roads I'm the one driving," she says.

She continues: "I have to handle store clerks, returns, getting documents signed, anything with any federal building or administrative work, I get further with any type of 'paperwork' thing that needs handled, people listen to me and are much more agreeable than with him.

"The chances that we find a black or interracial couple on a greeting card are SLIM. Unless you want to give the same black couple card every year, which we have. There are hundreds of white couples to choose from though!

"My husband goes out of his way to be nice and talk to EVERYONE. Not because he’s a people person, but because he has learned that a 6’5 black man intimidates people and so he overcompensates by being overly friendly so people won’t be afraid of him."

She goes on to say how none of their neighbours believed they could afford their own home and asked her father if he was their landlord - when in fact they have paid off their mortgage by themselves.

Pamela also shared how she struggles to find black or mixed race dolls for her daughter to play with and how her husband has to stay by their daughter's side all the time when at the playground, as "he gets stares and people wonder what the 'big black man' is doing on the park bench".

And one of the most upsetting points on the list is that the family haven't even been able to share their support properly for the Black Lives Matter movement as Walter was "concerned" having a sign by the door would make the family a "target".

Pamela added: "This post isn’t to make people say 'oh poor you, I’m so sorry' etc etc. we have a wonderful life and are thankful for it. But...changes need to happen. This is just a small glimpse into the intentional and unintentional racism that happens everywhere, all the time.

"I want a better world for our daughter so I’m happy that things are changing. I know a lot of you are tired of the protests and tired of the changes and tired of people complaining. Well I’m tired of my husband having to talk to everyone and never complain even when they mess up his order 10,000 times,

"I’m tired of driving damn near everywhere, I’m tired of the sick feeling I get when a cop pulls behind us, I’m tired of having to worry anytime my husband has to work OT and leaves in the middle of the night, I’m tired and I’ve only been on this ride seven years, imagine a lifetime of this!"

The list went viral, with more than 128,000 people sharing the post and thousands commenting on it.

One person replied: "Thank you for sharing. Really eye-opening. You have a beautiful family."

Another said: "This is a wake up call! This really makes it clear what happens every where everyday."

A third added: "Thank you for sharing these very personal, powerful words about your family and life.

"It's time for a change. I stand with you."

Pamela's post received so much interest that she's since set up a Facebook page for her family.