Five parenting mistakes that destroy kids’ mental strength
By ESTHER MUCHENE | 1 month ago
With so much that is happening all around us and in the world, parents can sometimes lose it and take it out on their young ones.
While it may not be intentional, some of us are guilty of overdoing certain things that do more harm than good for our children.
To foster mental resilience in our kids it is crucial we prepare them for the future. This may mean taking a step back in certain instances, or putting your foot down depending on the circumstances.
There may be no parenting manual but as parents, we must be aware of what we are doing that may destroy our kid’s mental strength.
Here are some things you may be guilty of doing so unknowingly.
Looking at their cute faces how can you possibly say no? Sadly, that is what many parents struggle with. Because we love our children and want the best for them, we tend to give them everything they ask for.
This, however, is not right. Let your kids learn how to wait and work for things or you will end up raising spoilt brats.
Teach them self-control and patience by setting certain rules in place first before they can get what they want. Watching TV, for instance, can happen after homework.
ii.Not setting boundaries
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Your child must understand who the parent is and who the child is. Do not make the habit of negotiating with your kids when it comes to rules.
They must learn how to respect you and the boundaries you have in place. Lack of consistency will send a certain message to them and will result in power struggles between the two of you.
iii.Having unrealistic expectations
Many parents make the mistake of setting the bar too high and expecting nothing short of perfection.
This will lead to self-esteem issues and your children will start to loathe you because everything they do is not good enough for you.
Let them know about aiming for big goals but don’t let it be the main driving factor for getting your love and approval.
Help them understand that failure is part of life and teach them how to overcome their short comings.
iv.Downplaying their feelings
How would it feel when your partner or a stranger told you to get over it when you were crying after receiving some bad news? It would hurt and break you right? Same case applies to our children.
Whenever they are upset or sad don’t tell them to ‘’shut up’’ or ‘’forget about it.’’ This will send off the message that you don’t care about their feelings and they should suppress them.
Be sensitive to what they are saying and going through then ask them how you can help them feel better rather than minimizing their emotions.
v.Not setting a good example
You have heard it a thousand times, kids look at what you do rather than what you say. So, you better start acting right from day one.
Don’t let them catch you losing your temper over someone cutting you off on the road. You can express your annoyance without being rude.
It is crucial to practice healthy coping skills when your kids are present. This will help them pick up similar habits.
Therefore, work on how you react when provoked or pushed to your limit, eat healthy, work out etc.
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