Men need Buddies

If you have been following this column these past few weeks, you will know that the writer lost his only brother recently; but today, I want to tell you about other ‘brothers,’ that is, other male figures a man may need in life.

Brothers — If a chap is lucky to have male siblings of his family around, then it is important to treasure them and see them as one’s fast and firm allies in a harsh world. Nothing in the world is stronger than a band of brothers, as you’ve known each other ‘forever.’

Best friend — A best friend is a fine thing for a man to have, you know, that guy who is always there for you through thick, thin and everything in-between. A bosom buddy should not only watch football and drink beer with you, but lend you money in hard times (which you must repay), lie to your girlfriend if need be, and take a blow, or bottle, to the head for one in the event of a bar-room brawl.

Older mentor — Life is like a long road, and it is a good thing for a man to follow someone who has been there before. Don’t be like those females who discovered ‘Scandal’ mid year, began talking tough to the Boss, and come September, are wondering why they have been demoted. Jack Bauer is not a mentor. Get an older feller whose life/career you admire. Then aspire to be like that, son.

Young buddy — But if you do not want to be a grumpy Grandpa before your time, take time to also hanging out around young folk, if only to know what’s going on in the world. That’s the secret of staying ‘young at heart.’ (The secret of looking very foolish is wearing bling and sagging your shorts yet you are forty something, unless of course, you’re Nairobi’s Senator).

Relative — there is always that ‘rela’ guy who is in touch with the entire family, hell, the whole clan – from your drunk cousin in Nyankisore to your lost ‘sister’ in Minneapolis. Keep in good communication with this one, for they come in handy during funerals (and to shout ‘no!’ when you’re about to say ‘I do’ to that first cousin you had no clue about).

Powerful friend — It always helps to know a powerful person or two in Kenya, whether it is your local MP, or the OCS of your local police station. Such people can come in quite handy when things get sticky or mambo yamefika mrama, yakawa gum.

The professionals — You often hear folk being told to seek a second opinion when it comes to professionals like doctors and lawyers, and by Lord, it helps when that ‘second opinion’ is by a professional with whom you are good friends. Of course there are some less useful professional pals. Like asking your pathologist friend: “Are you sure he is dead?” and the gentleman says, “Well, his head is missing

Photo credit: courtesy