Girl talk: Guys, work on your texting chemistry, it matters a lot to us

I’ve realized that I have given quite a number of men the brush-off simply because I felt that the textual chemistry was off.

Yes; textual not sexual. I am allergic to boring texters! I don’t care how hot or affluent a man is; if I get a feeling of dread and disinterest instead of excitement when my phone lights up with his name, he is not the one for me.

I know all too well that awful feeling of disenchantment when you meet a man who ticks all the boxes only to start texting and realise that he is a monotonous, uninteresting and dreary texter who gives you absolutely nothing to work with! It is so frustrating! If you want to date me, you need to learn how to be a good conversationalist and show it on those short messages.

I have been in two serious relationships in the past and I think that part of the reason these two relationships worked out so well is because in both cases, the textual chemistry was off the charts.

I actually met one of these guys online and I knew from our very first exchange that we would go on to have a wonderful union. He was witty, charming and just had a knack for sending interesting texts effortlessly.

I could spend a whole night texting with this guy. Our conversations just flowed so well that sometimes we would lose track of time just texting each other. His texts needless to say, also reflected his being. From my experience, boring texters are just as mind-numbing conversationalists in real life. Beware of men who don’t know how to pull their weight in a text world. There is nothing I hate as much as participating in a one-sided texting where I am the only one carrying the conversation.

It is so annoying when you spend minutes of your precious time trying to build a rapport with a guy on text by telling him interesting things and being flirty and sweet only for him to reply with zero value added messages like “haha” or “that’s nice”.

There is this other category of boring texters who never want to end the conversation even as they emerge as dry as dust.

Guys, and I can’t emphasize this enough, it is okay to end a conversation if you feel like you have run out of things to talk about. Don’t force it.

The other problem I have with some men’s texting habits is the rushed sexting. I detest men who only get chatty on texts when the topic of sex comes up.

I know we are not compatible if you bring up sex five texts into the conversation. It is such a turn off!

Dear men, a blue photo is not a conversation starter, if you have nothing to say apart from sex, then we are not textually compatible.

Don’t get me wrong, I love sexting and I can sext like the best of them. However, I want to date guys who are excited to chat about other things as well.

Sexual chemistry is overrated. Textual chemistry is where you really get to separate the wheat from the chaff.

I have no problem finding a guy who can make me horny. The problem is finding a guy that I am excited to text.