How do I make a man fall in love with me? How do I make a man treat me right and commit to me? These are two questions I have gotten a lot this year. My answer: while there are a few things you could do to increase the chances of a man falling in love with you – improving your physical attractiveness, exuding confidence, being elegant etc – you can’t make a man to love you or treat you right. You can go above and beyond for a man. You can do everything in your power to try and convince him to care. You could bend over backwards to please him and strive to be the best girlfriend to him. However, the truth of the matter is, you can only do so much. At the end of the day, he has free will. He can choose not to care.
There is nothing nearly as agonising as giving your all to a man who shows no interest in giving anything back. It is soul crushing to love a man who just seems not to care at all. Instead of walking away, most women choose to fight harder to make the man love them. There is a difference between fighting for a relationship that has a genuine connection and is just going through a rough patch, and fighting for a lopsided relationship that has no future. The latter will just leave you hurt and disappointed, no matter how hard you try.
We have all been there. You meet a terrific guy and fall head over heels for him. He seems interested in you in the beginning just to have sex with you. After that, he ignores you completely, or if he is particularly evil, he continues to string you along just to keep having sex with you. You have fallen in love with him and deep down, you know the feelings aren’t mutual, but you are convinced you can make him see you as much more than a hook up. You feel like you could will him to fall in love with you by being the perfect woman. You try to always look attractive for him, you cook and clean for him, you please him in bed, but all your efforts are to no avail. Nothing changes. He still treats you badly. He openly shows you he doesn’t care or he is only interested in a casual relationship.
You need to stop making a fool out of yourself in an attempt to prove your value to a man. All you will get is heartache and wasted time on a man who doesn’t care and will never care about you. The painful truth is that you will never be able to change the way a man feels about you, no matter how much you beg and cry. It is out of control. You will never be in charge of how he feels. You will never persuade him to feel about you the way you feel about him. Let him go. Another man will come along and you wont have to beg for his time and attention. You won’t need to make him love you because he will choose to love you. In the meantime, as cliché as it sounds, learn to love yourself and make yourself better. Be someone that can be loved.