My pastor has a phrase “God works in mysterious ways”. As a firm believer I can attest to the practicality of this. Many men will surely back me up when I say women too are mysterious in their own ways.
They may not be at God’s level, but still, the mystery is puzzling. I don’t know..... but I think that ladies are infact the relationship: In most if not all the cases as they actively keep it alive.
You think you know her? Well, you don’t. Ladies do a lot of things behind the scenes, just to make sure that they are in the right place with the guy.
The actions are perhaps valid precautionary measures, as she pursues her relationship.
She will be cool about these things, yet silently she will do them, just to make sure she is in your court for every good reason.
1. Visualizing the future
Why this happens, only ladies can explain. But for her it isn’t just about dating, it’s about seeing a possible workable future. A man is seen as a prospective to a successful future.
All the signs should indicate this!
Just so you know, they already have in mind the number of kids they want to have with their man! Let alone the fact that she has not even met the man’s parents, yet still, she remain the carrier of hope, foreseeing the positive thing, most men, dread.
2. Leaving Things at His Place
Most of time, it’s by “Accident”
Well, that sleepover is always a way out of the closet. First she leaves her handkerchief, perhaps ,her favorite dress and of course the toothbrush.
I am not so good in boundary management, (if there is such a thing) but it is a sure way of marking a territory, just in case some ‘enemy’ else tries to feel comfortable
3. Stalking his ex-boyfriends Facebook page
I wish to clarify this. It’s not that she wants to go back(or maybe she does), but she just goes back to get updated with how the ex is doing. I don’t actually see anything wrong with this, but sometimes just doesn’t feel right about it. I mean gone is gone! But I could be wrong.
It’s a thing among number of these ladies that define our relationships.
4. Testing to see how much you can handle
Reminds me of the Biblical story of the witch(from my Sunday school) who tempted Jesus. Like how far can this guy go to make me feel comfortable. Ladies will say stuff, or do some things just to see how his man will respond. I once heard of a lady who would pretend to be soooo ill, just to see how her guy would take care of her.
It’s a good thing, I should say: How else would she know his other side?
5. Checking it out his medicine
A scene in Shuga, a film series stuck in my head: A lady went to his bathroom the morning after just to find some ARV pills. The look on her face can only be compared to the messy aftermath of a hurricane.
I back this up, it is a good thing to know these stuff ladies. I mean what does he use to shave, does he have some pain killers just in case you hit by headache? I mean you respect his privacy and all that, but hey, you got to know.